Red Hearts and Crossed Strings
by modeststroke
Summary: Teresa Lisbon hesitantly follows her consultant, Patrick Jane, on a mad chase to catch the serial killer Red John. Soon the bickering duo are swept into a foreign world where everything seems to be working against them. Will they be able to make it back to California? Or will their differences stop them from ever seeing home again?
1. Chapter 1: Caught Red Handed

**Caught** **Red** **Handed**

Chilly winds disturbed the once still curtains and sent a draft into the dark room. Lisbon shivered and tugged the blankets up over her neck. Her body trembled. Locking her feet together and pulling her knees to her chest she curled up into a ball. Seconds later, she shifted again.

The cycle went on for an hour before Lisbon threw off the covers and stomped across the room. It was useless to sleep. Lying in bed provided time to think, and time to think caused Lisbon's body to shudder.

Padding down the stairs, Lisbon slipped into her kitchen. The warm brown walls made her tense shoulders fall. With a small smile, she opened a nearby cupboard and hooked her fingers around the handle of a brown mug. There wasn't a need to rush. Not tonight. Not when every time she tried to rest she ended up tossing and turning. Sighing, the slouching woman looked at the clock. It read 2:30am. She watched with a frown as the long hand slowly ticked around the circle. After staring the clock down for a whole minute, Lisbon walked away with as much dignity she could muster and opened the fridge. Milk. She wanted milk.

Shuffling through the contents she took a mental note to sort through her food. Almost everything she pushed aside was passed it's date. Lisbon quickly found and swiped the milk before she could think of anything else that needed to be done. Closing the fridge door, she poured her drink and tossed it in the microwave to let it heat up. If she was going to be up all night, why not be up with a warm mug of milk?

As the microwave buzzed, Lisbon let her head fall against her hands. Her palms started messaging her temples on autopilot as she went through her ever growing mental list. _Sort through paperwork, sign paperwork, deal with stupid consultant, try to keep Grace from kissing Wayne in the office . . ._

 ** _Beep! Beep! Beep!_**

Jerking her head to the alarm, Lisbon came back to the present situation. The microwave was yelling at her quite obnoxiously, and she silenced it by yanking the door open and taking her steaming milk out.

For the past week, all Lisbon could do at night was sip hot milk from a mug. It helped her sleep. And lately, Lisbon would do anything to get a moment of sleep.

 _Mommy, will you sing me a lullaby?_

 _I sang to you last night Teresa._

 _I know, but I like it when you sing to me._

 _Alright. But tomorrow you must sleep by yourself._

 _Okay!_

Lisbon brought the mug to her lips, and as the warm liquid slipped down her throat she sighed. It would be a long night. Just as it had been a long month. As a senior agent for the Serious Crimes unit at the California Bureau of Investigation she had responsibilities, and a team that put their lives on the line for her every day. She had no time to deal with her own personal issues. It would distract her, and that could put lots of people in danger.

 _Dad stop it! You're hurting him! Stop!_

Almost choking on her milk, Lisbon coughed. Heaving and beating her fist against her chest, she managed to spit the thick drink out before slumping onto a nearby chair. Clenching her dark brown hair in her fists, she leaned against the table and shuddered. This had to stop. It had to . . .

The minutes ticked by. Half an hour had already passed since she had gotten out of bed. Lisbon gripped the edge of the table and held back the frustrated tears that were threatening to cloud her eyes. Her body was drooping, her hair was a mess, and her stomach felt unsettled. Maybe, she could try to drag herself up to bed again? She was certainly tired enough. Although, exhaustion wasn't the cause for her minor insomnia. The cause was something deeper. Sometimes she was even unsure of what it was herself.

 ** _VRRRRRMMMMMM . . ._**

Lisbon jumped. The sound of her vibrating cell broke the silence of the room. Snorting, she grabbed the device from the table and flipped the screen to see her annoying consultant Patrick Jane staring back at her. She considered not answering it at first. In the past he dragged her here and there because of a hunch, or a "theory". Not that he was ever wrong. But she really didn't want to deal with him right now. On the other hand, he had limits. Jane wouldn't call at 3:00 am unless it was something dire. At least, he had better hope he wouldn't.

"Hi Jane." Lisbon tapped her fingers against the wooden tabletop as she waited for her colleague to respond. Seconds passed, and nothing. "Jane?" She repeated.

"Lisbon, I need you to get dressed. I'll pick you up in a few minutes." Jane said after a few long seconds.

The tapping stopped. Lisbon scrunched her brow. "What are you playing at?"

"I'll explain later." He said.

"No, I want you to explain now please." On the other end of the line there was a sigh. Lisbon waited patiently and leaned back in her chair. They were stuck at another pause, so she pushed him a little closer to the edge. " I'm not going if you don't tell me what the hell is going on. It's three in the morning and you woke me up out of nowhere!"

"I didn't wake you up. If I had woken you up you wouldn't have waited to answer your phone. You would have picked it up right away instead of contemplating if I was worth answering."

"Right now, I'm thinking it was a mistake. Now tell me what's going on or I'm hanging up."

Small scuffing noises sounded through the phone. Jane was pacing. "I know where Red John is . . ." He whispered.

Everything around Lisbon was meaningless after those words slipped from his lips. Red John is a vile and dangerous man. five years ago, Jane's wife and daughter were murdered by Red John. Even now, the man's disturbed signature is stained onto Jane's wall. A red smile, painted with the victims blood.

"Red John has hid himself away at an abandoned warehouse. It's just on the outskirts of Sacramento. We can make it there by 7:00am if we leave in the next hour."

"Hold on. How did you find out where he is?" Lisbon wasn't entirely convinced by Jane's story. She still remembered the day he left a living horse in her office as a birthday present.

"I've compiled lists Lisbon. Lots of lists. Let's just say I narrowed it down after remembering everyone significant I have ever met." Jane's voice was beginning to sound impatient. The quiet pacing noise had picked up to a faster scratching sound.

"Alright, alright. I can be ready, just give me five minutes. I'll call the team, an-"

"No!" Lisbon's shoulders seized at Jane's sudden outburst. "You can't call the team. I didn't even want to call you . . . Red John is mine."

"Well if you didn't want to call me, then why did you?" Lisbon grunted. Her free hand found it's way to her hip and her brows furrowed. On the other side of the conversation there was a chuckle. Lisbon quickly let her hand slip back down in embarrassment. It was like he had a sixth sense. She wouldn't be surprised if he was hiding a third eye in the perfect mess of blond curls atop his head.

"I called you, my dear Lisbon, because we are partners. And because if I didn't you would surely throw me out a window the next time you saw me . . . Or punch me in the nose again. You are an abusive boss, you know that?"

"Yes, I do."

"So will you come with me?" His voice was quiet and dangerous. The sensation it created was befitting of a slowly approaching fog. Hazy and mysterious, with no way of knowing what lay ahead without diving in head first.

"I don't think you've given me an option." Lisbon stood up and headed for her room. "I'll be ready when you get here, just wait outside. My house is a mess right now." She kicked a crumpled shirt that was lying limply in the middle of the stairs. Though her house wasn't necessarily a disaster, she didn't like the idea of Jane, the not so natural disaster, coming inside. The man was capable of much more than his cocky smile let on.

"Alright, I'll be there soon."

* * *

Jane closed the cell phone and looked at the red blood stain on the wall of his daughter's room. The stain stared back at him with unblinking eyes and a taunting smile. Resting a hand on his head, he turned away to face the other direction. _Why did I call Lisbon?_ The thought passed through his head for the umpteenth time. Even as he was talking to the woman, he kept regretting it. But at the same time, he felt something else. _I feel relieved that she's coming with me . . . But why?_

He stayed there for a few more minutes, thinking. He was going against everything he knew. Red John, had always been his. Sure, the CBI helped him find the murderer, but after that Red John would be his to deal with. Now he was bringing Lisbon with him to sneak up on Red John, and kill him. Only Lisbon wouldn't see it that way. Lisbon was a woman of justice and law. Since the two of them met, she had always been the same. She gave everyone, or at least almost everyone, a fair trial. She stood up for what she felt was right. And if you ever questioned one of her team members, you wouldn't sleep well that night.

Jane and Lisbon were partners and, in Jane's head, very close friends. Though they were very different, they always found a strange way to connect each other. But there was one subject they tended to fight over. Lisbon believed that she could convince him to let Red John go to court, and then be sentenced to whatever punishment the law decided he deserved. That entire prospect made Jane laugh. He would be the one to kill Red John, and not even Lisbon could change his mind. But that brought on another inner quarrel. If, no, when he killed Red John, would he lose Lisbon too?

Getting to his feet, he went to his closet and took out one of his many three piece suits. Lisbon would be waiting for him if he kept going at this pace. And he planned to make it be the other way around.

* * *

Lisbon finished rinsing her hair and went to turn off the shower. But she hesitated. Warm water dribbled across her back, and the sensation was almost like a massage. She didn't want to leave yet. Taking a step back from the handle, she let the water fall across her arms and head for a few more moments. It was her therapy, and she definitely needed it.

Her legs felt weak, and her eyes were heavy. Taking a breath, she readied herself for the day ahead. So far, it felt normal. She felt a strange sensations of peace and tranquility. It wasn't what she had expected. She was about to walk straight into Red John's territory, and she felt fine. But she knew why. And it was a common reason that she used for almost everything she felt happy about. It was a distraction.

Lisbon shivered as the water suddenly grew cold. Her mind was flooding around her. Instinctively, she wrapped her arms around herself protectively. The fears from her childhood always seemed to sneak up on her at the worst times. She could never sleep, and she could never be truly at peace while alone. She wasn't allowed to be at peace. Not when she held so many failures on her shoulders.

Her father's face flashed in her mind, and in a moment of panic Lisbon threw her hand forward and hit the shower handle. In mere seconds the room temperature droplets turned into a heavier stream of scolding needles. With a scream, Lisbon leapt out of the tub and turned off the water.

Lisbon quickly grabbed a large towel from her rack and wrapped it around her seething body. She bit her lip as the throbbing burns began to sting. She could feel her eyes beginning to water but blinked the tears away and escaped to her room where she had taken out her clothes. She'd picked out some usual work appropriate clothing, a white blouse and a black jacket, along with some black denim pants. She was about to let her towel drop to the floor when she heard the sound of her door opening from downstairs. Then a voice called, "Lisbon!" And she swore.

She tried to gather her thoughts, but they shattered for the second time in a matter of seconds when she heard footsteps coming up the stairs. A second later, the door to her room opened and she was facing her consultant with just a towel on. She considered herself lucky that it reached down to her knees.

Lisbon's face flushed bright red. Without thinking she grabbed the nearest thing, a bible, and thrust it at Jane. Jane yelped and ducked before the bible could slam into his face. Without another word he fled the room and kicked the door shut behind him. Lisbon stayed staring for a moment before she quickly got dressed and grabbed her bag. She made sure her gun was tightly tucked into her belt before retreating down the stairs to where Jane was sitting on the couch. His face was still flushed.

"I told you not to come in." Lisbon grunted. She wrapped her arms over her chest and glared at the man. Jane looked up with puppy dog eyes and pouted. "Why did you even think it was okay to barge into my room?"

Jane smiled before standing up. Now he was looking down at her. She was a good head shorter than him, though he knew she could easily take him down in a second. "I wanted to be rebellious and enter the scary Teresa Lisbon's natural habitat."

Lisbon growled and kicked Jane is the knee before heading out the door and closing it hard behind her. Jane bit his lip as he realized he might have crossed the line, but quickly followed after her. Rule one about Lisbon was that you never left her waiting when she was cranky.

Outside, the air was cold. Lisbon wrapped her arm's around herself wishing she had brought a warmer jacket. Jane came out from behind her and she saw he was doing the same. "It's cold tonight. He said, his voice tense and shaky.

"Cold for California at least." Lisbon looked at her watch and sighed. It was 3:30am. "You said we would be there around seven right?

Jane nodded and the two of them walked down the steps and stopped at Jane's car. His hands dug into his pockets as he searched for his keys before he pulled them out and unlocked the door. Lisbon would usually have taken the driver's seat, except she didn't know where they were going, and she didn't trust Jane's car. It was an old blue citroen DS. She wondered where he had gotten the french car, but she was scared he might say he stole it. She wouldn't put it past him. he wasn't exactly a man that cared about the law.

When the engine started, both of them looked at each other. Jane suddenly appeared pale, and Lisbon was shivering, but not from the cold. They were going to find Red John. They were going to catch the serial killer that had ruined Jane's life. But they were also going to a dangerous location with no back up and no one knowing they were gone.

"It's going to be okay." Jane said.

Lisbon looked back to the road as the car started moving. "I know." she answered with a hint of embarrassment. After that, there was complete silence as Jane focused on the road and Lisbon focused on nothing in particular except the anxiety dwelling in her stomach.

"What are you thinking?" Jane asked

Exhaling, Lisbon shook her head. "I'm thinking that this was a stupid idea . . . I'm supposed to go into work this morning." pointing an accusing hand at Jane she added, "And now I'm on a wild goose chase with you. Hightower is going to kill me!"

Jane rolled his eyes. "The boss can't fire you. You're irreplaceable. I've already made it clear I won't let anyone else 'handle' me." His face contorted into a wicked grin.

Lisbon let out a small grunt and closed her eyes as she laid back against the seat. "Yeah, I'm doing such a good job at controlling you." Her words were soaked with sarcasm, but Jane filtered it out and accepted it as a gritty compliment.

* * *

The road was barely lit apart from the sun just rising in the distance. They were in the outskirts of Sacramento, and Jane's palms were sticky with perspiration. Red John was close and all he could think about was what would happen if he killed him. Sometimes he was so sure it was what he wanted, and other times he just didn't know. He could lose everything all over again. His friends, his not so much of a career, and Lisbon. He could lose his partner. Looking over for a moment, he glanced at her. She hadn't said anything for a long while, and he soon figured out why. She had fallen asleep.

Jane let his attention rest on Lisbon for a few extra moments. He noticed the cross necklace she always wore tucked into her shirt, and how her dark brown hair draped lazily over her shoulders. He had noticed, right from the start of the phone conversation, that she was tired. In fact, he noticed every day. She would come into work with a coffee in hand and go straight to her office. Then, she would shut herself in there for hours at a time. Unless she was giving orders or out on the field, she was in her office. One day, he swore she would drive herself crazy. So he had made it his job to keep her busy, and he had to say, he did a great job.

Checking the surroundings, he realized they were almost there. In the distance, black against the bright orange sun, Jane could make out a lonely warehouse. It was steadily creeping up on them. Reaching out with his hand he gently rustled his sleeping partner. She groaned in annoyance before opening her eyes. "Morning." Jane said cheerily.

Lisbon growled before straightening her back and peeking out the window. Sunlight shimmered against the glass from a far off horizon, and He slowed the car down as they came up to a dirt driveway. In front of them was an intimidating warehouse.

Moss climbed up the edges of the abandoned wooden walls, and the coming sunrise flooded over the barren lot. All around was dirt and stone. The smell of dust shrouded the area and could make a frog's croak dryer than a desert. Stones dotted the dirt wasteland, and Lisbon had to wonder if they were really just in the outskirts of Sacramento, or if Jane had somehow driven them into a wasteland.

Jane was the first to get out of the car, but Lisbon quickly followed after, only stopping to draw her gun from the belt around her waist. As they neared the entrance to the rotting structure, Jane fell in behind her. Raising her gun, Lisbon led Jane into the darkness, and whatever fate awaited them inside.

It smelled of decay. The stale scent of moss hung in the air, mixed with the unmistakable tang of blood. Jane had covered his nose with his arm, but with her hands on her gun, Lisbon was left with dealing with the disturbing smells.

It was almost too dark to see, and other than the faint sunlight that dappled the room through crakes int he wooden walls, there was no light. "Jane?" Lisbon whispered sharply. The man jumped slightly before sending her a glare. "Do you have the flashlight?"

Jane's blue eyes lightened from their short tempered anger as he dug into his pocket and handed her a small black flashlight. Lisbon fiddled with it as her fingers found the switch. A stream of light shot out of the flashlight and the twosome continued through the dank house.

"What are you going to do if we find Red John?" Lisbon whispered.

It took Jane a few moments before he answered, "I'm going to kill him. I'm going to cut him up into little pieces, and watch him squirm."

Lisbon turned around immediately. Her green eyes were piercing and she grabbed his arm with a tight fist. Even though Jane had to look down to meet her in the eye, it didn't make her any less menacing. "I won't let you do that. You do that and you're throwing everything away. You'll go to jail Jane! Do you really want that?" She was struggling to keep her voice down. Her jaw was clenched tightly as she waited for her partner to answer her, to tell her he wouldn't do something stupid like he always did.

But he didn't.

Jane rested a hand on Lisbon's forehead, Pushing her bangs to the side with his thumb. Lisbon watched him, slightly confused. His hand slipped down to her shoulder, and before she knew what was happening, he had turned her to face the other way. With a small tap on her back, he made her continue walking forward.

"I won't let you throw your life away." she whispered.

Lisbon had always been there for him. Jane didn't even know why. He had done nothing for her, aside from save her life a few times. But really, she had gotten into danger because of him. She was always going headfirst into danger, she was always in the front-lines. _How did I get so lucky, to end up working with her?_

Lisbon dealt with lots of personal troubles. Jane could tell that much. Yet, she never talked about her problems. She never complained or tried to make others pity her. He liked that about her. He wasn't in love with her, he could never love someone again. Not after his wife and daughter died. But he did feel devotion and-

 ** _"_** ** _Watch it!"_**

Lost in thought, Jane hadn't noticed Lisbon had stopped walking. Ahead of them was a closed door with dried blood on the rusted gold knob. The knob looked like it was about to fall out, only hanging on my a loose piece of metal. Putting a finger to her lips, Lisbon signaled Jane for silence. Slipping close to the door, she rested her ear against it.

There wasn't any noise on the other side of the door. But it was the only room they hadn't gone through yet. Red John had to be in there. Sucking a breath and raising her gun, Lisbon kicked the door. It swung open with a loud cracked and she and Jane rushed into the room.

 **"** **Put your hands on your head and get on your knees!"**

A man stood in the center of the small room, unmoving. Lisbon stepped closer. The man did not move. "I said, put your hands on your head!" She said again, her voice shaking with a creeping sense of unease.

Nothing moved for minutes. And Lisbon's arms began to hurt from keeping her gun raised for so long. Impatience nipped at her and soon she was stomping over to the man with Jane at her heels. "Are you deaf?" She reached out and grabbed his shoulder, pulling him close. "I said-" She stopped. The man had no light in his eyes. She quickly let go and stumbled backwards. He was dead.

"There's a string holding him up." Jane said. He pulled at a thin string that held the man up so that it looked like he was standing.

"Nothing can get past you, can it Jane?"

Jane raised his head, and Lisbon whipped around. The third voice came from the open doorway. A man waltzed in confidently. He was about the height of Jane, and his brown hair was messily brushed atop his head. In his hand, he held a gun.

"Very clever," Jane said. "You killed an innocent man and left him here as a decoy. Then, when you lured us in, you could have the element of surprise."

The man shrugged. "Honestly, I didn't know if it would work. I thought for sure you would catch on much sooner." The man grinned as he shut the door and locked it. "But I guess I didn't have to worry."

Jane took a step forward, but Lisbon stopped him with her arm. "Jane, I'm not letting you near that man. You're unarmed, and unpredictable."

Crooked laughter erupted from the man and Jane and Lisbon both flinched at the harshness of it. "Oh look, Patrick Jane, the man of wonders, has a babysitter!"

Lisbon narrowed her eyes, but refused to fall for the taunt. Jane on the other hand, began to squirm. He grabbed her shoulders, and she instantly threw herself away as his fingers dug into her burned skin. Biting her lip, she wiped her watering eyes.

Jane stumbled backwards and looked at Lisbon in surprise. But before either of them could recover from their shock, the stranger charged at them. Lisbon gasped in surprise as she felt the man's weight slam into her back. In an instant she was curled up on the ground. A foot landed hard on her back, pushing her hard against the grime covered wood. Her back was burning and pulsing, like she was being soaked in the rivers of Hell.

"Well Jane, it looks like I won. Face it. I've always been one step ahead of you. Everyone told you, even your own partner."

As Red John gloated over his "victory" Lisbon carefully collected her gun from where it had slid to the ground and pointed it at Red John. Her arms kept shaking as she tried to aim for his leg, but before she could shoot him, the weapon was knocked from her unsteady grasp.

Red John grabbed her by the back of her shirt and stole her handcuffs. He swiftly latched them to her wrists and left her on the ground.

Jane couldn't do anything but stare. The man he wanted to kill so much was right in his reach, yet he could do nothing. He was a consultant, he didn't have a gun. And Red John did. He had a knife, but there was no way he could get close enough to use it effectively.

Red John pulled out a gun and pointed it at Lisbon. Fear pulsed throughout Jane's entire body and he could feel sweat forming on his forehead. Lisbon looked scared as well, but she held a defiant scowl. Red John simply laughed, "I'm just kidding, I don't want to shoot her. I have something more interesting planned." Red John locked eyes with Jane before moving away from Lisbon. "Go sit beside her."

Jane narrowed his eyes and slowly walked over and sat beside Lisbon, staying on his toes. Silently, he helped her up and let her lean back against him. She wasn't in pain anymore, she had stopped clenching her jaw, but he wanted her close. He wanted to make sure nothing happened to her. Because it would be his fault again. That was something Jane just couldn't deal with.

"You two have been partners for years now. I've seen how you two have grown closer and closer. Your partnership is stronger than most." Red John started. He was glaring at them as if he was planning on painting a picture, taking in every little detail. "You're great friends aren't you? You care about each other. Patrick, what would you do if you lost that friendship? You wouldn't have anything."

Lisbon struggled with the handcuffs in an attempt to get her hands out of them. But as expected, it was no use. She glared at Red John and waited for him to keep talking, but he just stared. He had the eyes of an eagle. She could feels his eyes piercing into her and picking through every little detail.

"I've come up with one final test for you Patrick. I'm going to break you. I'll snap you like a twig, and I won't even have to touch you."

Jane held Lisbon closer, ignoring her mutter of protest. Red John walked past them towards a closet. He pulled out a rusted mirror the size of an average door. "I've decided the funnest way to do this, is to send you two away." The mirror was now just in front of Jane and Lisbon. They stared at their reflections. There wasn't any distance between their bodies. And they were both shaking with fear.

Red John pulled out a small remote from his pocket and glided his thumb over the single button in the middle. Then, he pressed it.

High pitched ringing echoed throughout the room. It vibrated through Lisbon's body and she tensed as everything around her turned into a mess of disorienting sounds. The mirror started shaking, rocking back and forth on it's legs. The glass cracked, then shattered, revealing some sort of black felt her body being dragged towards the broken mirror, and she desperately struggled with her handcuffs.

"JANE!"

Jane grabbed her, but it didn't help. He too was being dragged into the mirror. The steady drawing winds whipped up into what felt like a storm trying to consume them. Jane could feel Lisbon's body being picked up off the ground, but it was only mere seconds before his was too. Before they could so much as scream, they were devoured by the mysterious mirror. The last thing Jane saw was the darkness consuming them.


	2. Chapter 2: Scarlet Bonds and Bound Cuffs

**Scarlet Bonds and Bound Cuffs**

The royal palace in Canterlot, home to the two princess sisters Celestia, and Luna. The two sisters worked together in harmony to bring out the sun and the moon each day and night. Without them, Equestria would be stuck at a standstill.

Celestia's chamber was filled with red velvet furniture and lined with golden wall footers. The tile floor was waxed daily, insuring that the princess of the sun could see her reflection in it whenever she looked down.

The red bed cushion beneath Celestia rolled as she adjusted her position for the umpteenth time. It was only early morning, but just thinking of the strenuous day that awaited her left her exhausted. Right now, her body was free of her usual heavy armor. Sometimes she wished that raising the sun was enough for her subjects, but that was only a fantasy.

Open courts were held frequently, giving citizens from all over Equestria a chance to ask their princess for favors. Celestia enjoyed helping the less fortunate. But on most occasions it was a room filled with greed. Farmers would ask for more land so they could make a larger profit. Some even dared to ask for longer days and warmer nights. "Our crops will grow larger and healthier without the long cold nights!" They would plead.

Rubbing her temples wearily, Celestia tried to shoo the troublesome thoughts from her mind. Open court wouldn't be for an hour or so. Maybe she could fit in an early morning flight before she was needed on her throne?

Jumping off her bed she headed towards her vanity mirror. The mirror was almost as tall as her, set up on a stand and angled upwards just slightly. The stainless glass was bordered with pure gold, and molded into swirling patterns. Staring into the glass could make anypony feel like royalty.

Celestia hid her chuckle as her reflection looked back at her. Her mane was a nest of messy stray rainbow curls, sticking out in every possible direction. Levitating a brush over with her sparkling yellow magic, she gently guided her untamed hair back into place.

Carefully, Celestia took the mascara from the table beside the mirror and guided it along the lines of her eyes. The makeup felt heavy and wet, but after wearing it for thousands of years, she was used to the way it stuck to her face and tickled her eyelids.

Finishing the last of her morning routine Celestia tucked her traditional golden body wear into place on her chest and rested her crown upon her head. Sometimes, Celestia hated the accursed thing. It was supposed to be not just a traditional object of of royalty, but a symbol of strength and compassion. And when she received the crown, she lacked those virtues. She had been ignorant and vain. Due to her thoughtless actions and the humility she had lacked, her sister had become Nightmare Moon.

All Luna had wanted was to be loved. And Celesta had taken that away without a thought in her mind. Luna had worked every night to make her belt of stars beautiful, and the moon she guided even more so. But ponies failed to see the her painting in the sky, and because of this, Luna grew angry. And Celestia, had done nothing but push her sister away.

The two regal sister's fought with conflicting desires in their heads after that. Celestia, had tried so hard to save her lunar sister from the beast she had become, while Nightmare Moon only wanted the thrill of vengeance, and for the beauty of eternal night to envelope Equestria forever.

Eventually, with no other choice, Celestia had been forced to use her last resort. With pain, and guilt already heavy in her heart, she had locked her sister in the moon for a thousand years. All that had happened back then was because of her own selfish actions. She had believed she was the most beloved and regal pony in the land.

 _How could I have been so blind and thoughtless . . ._

Even now, even while her sister was back and had forgiven her, Celestia still carried that same guilt. And it would forever sit like a canary in its cage.

 ** _CRRRRAAAAAAAACKKKKK!_**

Pulsing magic penetrated the princess's memories, pulling her back from the depths. The invisible force ripped through the silence and pulsed through Celestia's head. It felt as if the earth had been shattered for a mere second, and then had reverted back to normal. Celestia raced out to the balcony and looked up into the sky. But there was nothing to be seen except for clouds and pegasi.

"Sister?!" The doors to Celesta's chamber flew open as Luna raced into the room. Her blue coat was still ruffled from sleep. "My sister, did you feel the tremor?"

Celestia nodded and let her gaze rise into the sky. The great blue canvas stretched out for miles, and there was nopony who could say where it ended. But somewhere out there, something had just happened. Something had broken through the vast magical barrier that should not have. And Celestia feared nothing good would come of it.

"We have been too lax Luna. Something has entered our kingdom . . . no, our world, that should not have. Our home has been disturbed." Celestia sighed. She put a wing over her sister's shoulder and nudged her messy night blue mane with her muzzle. "Now go rest my sister. You only just lowered your moon."

Luna stifled a yawn and shook her head."No, you felt that tremor Celestia! It was close! We could be in danger!" Luna narrowed her eyes and scanned the land from the railing.

Celestia took a moment to calm herself before reaching out to Luna with a hoof. She carefully guided her sister away from the railing and met her eye to eye. "We must wait . . ."

"But sister-"

Celestia gently cut her younger sister off and continued, "I do not wish to disturb peace with something that might not be dangerous. We can't jump to conclusions." Thinking momentarily, she added, "I will send a letter to Twilight Sparkle."

Luna looked down in confusion and tapped her bare hoof against the glass flooring. "But, why would you send a message to Twilight? We haven't an idea what we're dealing with!"

"And a princess never does. This can be Twilight's first true task as a princess of Equestria. But if need be, we will step in and help."

* * *

"Lisbon?"

A strange void of emptiness had seemed to have drowned Lisbon. And as she floated in silence, she felt free and at peace. It was a strange feeling really. Something she thought she could never truly have was flowing everywhere around her. She could feel something tickling her skin and brushing against her cheek. But for now, she ignored those feelings and let herself stay weightlessly in the middle of nowhere.

"Lisbon?

With closed eyes and a thoughtless mind, Lisbon felt safer than she had for a long while. She didn't have anything to think about. She didn't even need to think. Actually, when she tried to think, everything just felt hazy and unclear. A nervous tingle started to settle in her stomach, and Lisbon started to wonder if she should in fact, open her eyes.

"Lisbon?"

Lisbon struggled to pull her eyes open, but they wouldn't budge. When she tried to move her arms, they wouldn't listen to her either. The nervousness in her stomach quickly grew into a panic that burned throughout her entire body, and she suddenly wished she hadn't let herself sink so far into the silent ocean. _Am I drowning?_

 **"Lisbon?!"**

Lisbon's eyes jerked open. The first thing she noticed was that she was warm. As her ability to process things returned, she noticed that she wasn't just warm, but that she was being held by someone. And that someone, she knew, was Jane. His arms were wrapped tightly around her, and her head was against his. All she could see was his golden hair. Warmth spread through her cheeks as she realized that the only reason he would be holding her so tightly was because he was worried.

"Jane, you're squishing me." She muttered, trying to keep her usual reluctant attitude in her voice. But the strange heat in her cheeks didn't go away.

Jane quickly loosened his grip and let her draw her head back. But what she expected to see wasn't there. Instead, she was greeted with a strange light orange and blond maned horse. The creature was staring back at her as if it was expecting her to say something. But at the moment, her jaw was hanging open in wonder. Its eyes . . . were so big.

"Lisbon? I know what you're thinking. But don't panic. Just take a look at yourself." it said, carrying Jane's voice.

 _Alright . . . so Jane's a horse . . ._ Lisbon just stared at him for a moment, in a daze. Then, she looked down at her arms. But they weren't there. Instead they had been replaced by thick gray hooves, still bound in handcuffs surprisingly. What disturbed her more was her lack of clothes. All that she wore now was short gray fur, and thankfully, her cross necklace. Nervously, she moved her hooves as much as the restraints would allow and batted the hair that hung down past her shoulders. It felt more course than it had before.

Lisbon shrieked and struggled out of Jane's grip. Taking in her surroundings, she almost fainted. Everywhere she looked there were horses walking around with a disturbing aura of casualty. Many of the creatures bore coats of pink or purple. Some of them even had a pair of wings or a horn. Lisbon stared dumbfounded, before swallowing the saliva that had puddled in her throat.

"Lisbon? Just listen, okay?"

Lisbon stared back at the light orange horse that was Jane, and cracked a smile. "You're kidding . . . You're kidding, right?" When Jane shook his head, she went silent. Her green eyes sharpened as her mind went into overdrive. "How do we get back home? Why are we here? Why do we look like animals from some kind of little kids show? Is this a sick joke?!"

Tapping his hoof against his chin, Jane thought, "Maybe. But I think Red John wants to do more than just have fun watching us panic. I say we stay calm and collective."

As he spoke, he noticed Lisbon's eyes slowly trailing up his head. She had completely zoned out. "What are you looking at?"

"You . . . have a horn." Lisbon murmured.

Jane stiffened. Tentatively, his front hoof traveled across the top of his head and through his curly yellow mane. And sure enough, there was a horn. His eyes widened and he before he could do anything he'd regret, he took a long and deep breath.

"Do I have a horn?"

Jane opened his eyes and stared back at her. Her dark mane was the same colour as her hair used to be. Yet, it was somehow styled to look like she had bangs sweeping across the top of her face. He found it adorable that even as a horse, she could carry them so well.

"No, I don't see one." Jane said. He walked over to her and stuck his hooves into her hair, moving it to the side. He felt strangely proud that he was able to find an excuse to touch her hair. It was surprisingly soft and still carried a small trace of the smell of shampoo. "No, definitely not. But your hair is-"

"Excuse me?"

Jane and Lisbon jerked around at the sound of the new voice. Standing in front of them was a slightly tall mare with a lavender coat. She wore a small crown atop her head and carried both wings and a horn. Behind her was a paparazzi of five other ponies. As Lisbon melted under the expecting twelve eyes, Jane narrowed his own.

"Welcome to Ponyville. Are you planning on staying? I've never seen you before, so I assume you're new to town." Jane narrowed his eyes with intrigue. The mare's voice, though happy and welcoming, was forced. What was she playing at? "My name is Twilight Sparkle, and these are my friends Applejack, Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, Rainbowdash, and Rarity. what are your names? If you don't mind me asking."

The pure white unicorn that Twilight had called Rarity audibly scoffed before pushing up closer to her friend. "Twilight, you're a princess now. You don't have to ask for their names. They should be bowing and telling you them anyways." Rarity batted at her rich purple mane and sighed. "If I were a princess, I would make sure everyone knew my name."

At that Twilight blushed and shuffled her wings. Adjusting her crown so that it fit snugly around her horn. She then cleared her throat nervously. "So . . . your names?"

"My name is Patrick Jane, and this is my assistant Teresa Lisbon." He shot her a wicked smirk, knowing she would have punched him if it weren't for the restraints around her hooves. But the metal contraption didn't stop Lisbon from giving Jane a terrifying scowl that said, "I'm going to kill you later."

Pinkie Pie threw herself in front of Twilight and smiled widely. Jane visibly winced at her bright pink coat and curly mane. "Hi! I'm Pinkie Pie! I can't wait to throw a super duper awesome fun 'Welcome To Ponyville' party for you!" The mare bounced up and down excitedly. "But first we have to get those hoofcuffs off you Teesa! You can't party with those on."

"Teesa?" Lisbon raised an eyebrow and jumped as Jane erupted into a fit of crying laughter.

"That's a cute nickname! Much better than Mother Teresa!"

"Shut it Jane!" Lisbon retorted. She turned to Pinkie Pie and tried to smile as casually as she could. "I'm sorry, but we really don't need a party. We just want some quiet." The pink pony shrugged without a trace of disappointment.

While Jane continued to chuckle and snort, Twilight stepped up to Lisbon and inspected the cuffs. "Why on earth are you strapped into these? Only criminals wear hoofcuffs." Shooting Lisbon a hard stare, Twilight said, "You aren't criminals are you?"

Narrowing her eyes, Lisbon growled. "No, actually, I'm not!" How dare this strange purple mare accuse her of being a law breaker?! She enforced the law!

Jane quickly stepped in before Lisbon could do react. Swiftly, he wiped the tears from his eyes before giving the 'princess' an apologetic smile. "As I said, she is my assistant. We were practicing a magic trick and . . . I lost the key to the lock."

Twilight still looked suspicious, but she seemed to accept what Jane said as the truth. Her horn began to glow with a purple aura, and suddenly the cuffs around Lisbon's hooves snapped off.

Jane stared in wonder. Biting curiosity arose in his mind and he held his lip in his teeth to hold back his questions, for he feared the answer he might get. _How did she do that? What kind of world is this?_

Twilight smiled on as if nothing strange had even occurred, but Lisbon shared Jane's dumbstruck face. Only she wasn't afraid to ask questions when she wanted answers.

"What did you just do?!" She demanded. Her green eyes blazing. Lisbon wasn't sure how to feel at that point. Every emotion seemed to be coursing through her at once. The blazing curiosity of not knowing. The dark creeping of dread and fear. And the racing adrenaline of excitement buzzing through her veins. She felt like she would explode without answers, without some kind of reassurance. She wanted it so badly it was dizzying!

Twilight seemed taken aback by their lack of knowledge, but a cyan pegasus with a rainbow mane fluttered over her head and playfully messed with her once neat bangs. "C'mon Twi! Not all ponies are egg heads like you!"

Twilight merely swatted Rainbow away and tidied her hair before she started her explanation. "I simply used a strength spell. It breaks down the metal in one location, utterly weakening it, and then finally snapping it."

"But isn't that unsafe? Couldn't a unicorn put into han- I mean, hoofcuffs, just break out of them?" Lisbon said. She was rubbing her hooves where the confining locks had been just seconds ago, relishing the feeling of air touching her fur.

"The unicorns are put into magic restraints so that they are unable to call on their magic to use against the police, and further more, only the princesses or high up agents in law enforcement can use the spell correctly. In other words. Even if you know how to cast the spell, it won't have effect unless you are qualified to use it." Twilight finished, looking quite proud of herself.

"So 'magic' is really important here in Ponyville isn't it?" Jane said, deciding to speak up.

"Not just in Ponyville, but in all of Equestria." Twilight pointed out. She couldn't stop her smile from stretching all the way across her face. But her proud expression twisted into one of confusion. "But, shouldn't you know this already? We learn about Equestrian society in public school."

Lisbon and Jane blushed in unison. _Considering we don't know anything about these ponies, we probably shouldn't go telling them we came here from another world . . ._ Lisbon thought. The nervous face Jane had taken on informed her that he was thinking the same thing.

"Hey! Where are your cutiemarks?!" Rainbowdash blurted out.

Rarity gave a dignified _hmmph_ before turning towards Jane and Lisbon. "Don't worry dears. I'm sure you will find your special talent some time. It's different for everypony."

Jane and Lisbon felt completely lost. What was a cutiemark? Was it the reason why everyone had tattoos on their flanks? If that was the reason, Lisbon didn't want one anyways.

"Well, since you're new to Ponyville, you probably don't have a place to stay." The voice came from an orange pony with a tied up blond mane. She lacked wings or a horn but she didn't seem to mind, for she carried herself confidently without a hint of self pity. She adjusted the brown cowboy hat that rested on her head and snickered a little. "I'm Applejack by the way. It's nice to meet yah." Her country accent shone through her friendly tone, and Lisbon couldn't help but smile at her hospitality.

"We never really thought of that." Jane replied. He rubbed the back of his head guiltily before adding, "Do you know anywhere we could stay? If only for a few days or so?"

Before the country mare could answer, she was thrown aside by a yellow pegasus with a light pink mane. The pegasus had been sitting quietly in the back, watching with wonder just moments ago. But now, she was up in Jane's face and smiling wildly. "You can stay with me!" She cried out! Her voice carried through the town. Several ponies that had been walking by turned to stare them.

"That's nice Fluttershy. But I don't think they want to stay somewhere with a bunch of animals." Rainbowdash cut in. She flew over to Lisbon and snatched her up off the ground by her stomach. Lisbon yelped and thrashed her legs helplessly as she dangled in the air. "And I'm pretty sure you can't stay in a cloud house. Neither of you are a pegasus." Rainbow shrugged and dropped Lisbon to the ground with a _thud._

"I hate to say it, but my barn is in quite the shape, and I don't think you would want to stay in there right now. Our house is a little small as well . . . I don't really have room." Applejack tapped the ground guiltily with her hoof, and Jane and Lisbon's eyes roamed towards Rarity, who looked at them with surprise.

"Me?!" she gasped. Lisbon narrowed her eyes and the pristine unicorn gave a smug grin. "I can't possibly let strangers into my home. I have my dear sister there. Who knows what could happen to her!"

Twilight rolled her eyes and the rest of the gang did their own exasperated actions. Eventually Twilight said, "I would love to have guests, but right now I'm . . . taking care of Spike! He's not feeling well and really needs his bed rest!"

The other ponies shot daggers at Twilight, but Fluttershy simply bounded with glee. "You can stay with me! You can!"

"There's a spare room in the basement of Sugarcube Corner! You could stay there!" Pinkie Pie took Jane by the hoof and yanked him along with her as she trotted across the town, not even waiting for a reply. Hurrying to her hooves, Lisbon followed clumsily. She was often klutzy on two legs, but four was more than she could handle.

"Come on slowpoke!" Rainbowdash pestered.

"I'm trying! Stop nagging me!" Lisbon snapped. She focused on the rhythm her somewhat steady hooves had created and picked up her pace. Soon she was able to keep up with the herd.

As they passed house after house, Lisbon noticed that this world was much like her own. She shouldn't have been so surprised. _After all, this world does have magic._ On their way to Sugarcube Corner, she spotted markets, hospitals, clothing stores, and even a dentist! _This place really manages to surprise you doesn't it?_

Worry wormed its way through her newborn curiosity as she remembered what she had to lose. _What if people are looking for us back in Sacramento? What if I get fired from CBI when I get back?_ That brought on another thought, and she stopped mid gallop. Deep inside her chest she could feel something drop like a rock. _What if we never get back?_

"Teesa! Hurry up! We're almost there!"

At Pinkie's excited call, Lisbon threw the thoughts away and raced after the bright pink mare. Everything would work out! After all, she had Patrick Jane with her! Even if that man had a way of getting into trouble, he also had a way of getting out of it.

 **"Stop calling me Teesa!"**

* * *

Sugarcube Corner was what Jane had thought it might be. Of course it wasn't the exact image, but it was close enough. The exterior of the building was bright pink, and it looked to be covered with sprinkles galore. Attached to the vibrant bakery were cupcakes and giant candy canes. None of which were edible.

Pinkie Pie had left to talk with Mr. and Mrs. Cake, leaving Lisbon and Jane alone with Twilight. The rest of the gang had left to go about their own business for the day. But Twilight, for some reason they couldn't think of, had decided to stay with them. No, she hadn't decided. She had insisted that she stayed with them, and wouldn't take no for an answer.

Right now the lavender mare was staring at them both with hungry eyes. Like she wanted to know something. Jane watched as Lisbon shuffled farther away from the mare's prying pupils.

After what seemed to take a year, Pinkie Pie bounced back to them and smiled. "I, Pinkie Pie, shall escort thee Teesa, and Patrick, to thees room!" she declared.

Lisbon cracked a smile and whispered cheekily into Jane's ear. "I'm pretty sure that isn't Shakespearian." she said.

"Maybe it's Pinkamenian." Jane answered.

As the boss and her consultant followed the pink pony down the steps, they fell into a comfortable vibe. Lisbon couldn't stop herself from holding onto a soft smile, and Jane was happy that he had actually managed to make the stubborn lady break out of her shell. Even if it was just for a few moments. But everything changed the moment they got to the bottom of the steps.

"Here's your new room!" Pinkie Pie shouted! Streamers twirled down from the ceiling out of nowhere and the lights flashed on in an instant. Magenta walls surrounded the small group of four. The room was moderately sized, and certainly big enough for two ponies to share. To the side of the room there was door with a fresh coat of white paint that brightened the room substantially. Jane guessed that it hid a bathroom behind it. Sunshine flooded through the stainless windows, bringing a homely warmth to the foreign surroundings. There was only one thing that caught both Jane and Lisbon's attention. There was one bed in the room, and two of them.

"And you only have to one thousand bits to stay!" Pinkie hollered!


	3. Chapter 3: Lost Bits and Rosy Tempers

**Lost Bits and Rosy Tempers**

"Pay?!" Jane and Lisbon both stiffened. It was like a boulder had crashed down on them to give them a strange and twisted reality check. It was a reality check reminding them that even though they were surrounded by strange multi coloured "ponies", they were still expected to pay for renting out rooms and buying food.

 _But who would think to bring a wallet full of money to take down a serial killer?!_ Lisbon scolded herself inwardly. _You should always carry a little bit of money! Even so, one thousand bits?_

"Bits are your currency here in Ponyville then?" Jane asked. His shoulders were still tense, but his voice managed to hide the worry he felt.

Twilight, who was looking rather pleased with herself for some reason, simply stated, "Of course. Bits are the currency everywhere in Equestria. I'm surprised two grown ponies don't know that." Her tail twitched behind her, and Jane and Lisbon gulped. "Where did you say you were from?"

"They didn't say. But since he's a showpony, he's probably from Canterlot, right?" Pinkie threw up her hooves at her deduction, and Jane smiled back at her, thankful for the lucky break.

"We're just not very informed about how everything works here in Ponyville. Canterlot is quite a bit different." Jane fed the lie to Twilight as if it were as easy as feeding crumbs to pigeons.

Twilight batted at her mane and frowned slightly, but her eyes were narrowed and hungry for more information. Pinkie Pie, oblivious to the building tension, grabbed Lisbon's shoulders and playfully shoved her towards the closed white door on the left of the room.

When Lisbon was finally released from the pink earth pony's clutch, she shot Pinkie Pie a glare that would have given anyone else shivers. But Pinkie Pie just grinned and flung the white door in front of the group open, revealing a glimmering white bathroom.

As welcoming as the bathroom was, Lisbon was almost scared to step inside. It seemed a shame to walk on the freshly cleaned floor with dirty hooves. But Pinkie led them in without a care. "We always wanted to have guests stay at Sugarcube Corner, but no one really visits Ponyville for a long while unless they are planning on living here. So it never worked out. But then you came!"

Guilt dug deep into Lisbon's chest as she continued to stare at the sparkling, pristine walls. "This is all very kind . . . But we don't have any money." Lisbon said, holding out an empty hoof as if to prove her point. "We're broke."

"But you're from Canterlot! You must have money!" Twilight countered, earning her a glare from the accused couple.

"We were jumped on our way to Ponyville." Jane said. Another lie. "Lisbon and I had been carrying our money with us at the time, along with our bags. We were just coming up to Ponyville when it happened. Some colts came out of no where and threatened us. We didn't have any choice but to hand over everything we owned." Every syllable was filled with fake, believable emotions. Twilight Sparkle and Pinkie Pie were both staring at them with round eyes, and Lisbon was tempted to jump in and stop the lies before they went too far. But she stood where she was. She pretended that she was bolted to the ground. _It will all be worth it in the end._

"I'm sorry . . ." Twilight croaked. "I've only just become a princess, I'm a little on edge I guess." The mare offered a gentle smile, straightening her slouching figure. "Listen, why don't I help you earn some bits? I'm sure Pinkie Pie will let you pay for your rent at a later date." She shot her friend a hopeful glance, and was answered with an excited nod. "I was going to reorganize the books at my house today. I live at the Ponyville library. Would you like to do it instead? I'd give you one hundred bits."

"That would be great!" Jane smiled cheerfully and jabbed Lisbon in the shoulder, shooting her a private wink. He had done it already, taken hold of the entire situation and twisted it until it fit to his benefit. Part of Lisbon admired his skills, but another part feared it. He was a good liar, perhaps a little too good.

"Just let me have the bits when you are ready to pay! Until then just make yourselves at home!" Pinkie Pie's voice cut into Lisbon's thoughts and she quickly plastered a grin onto her face. All she had to do was play the part of a robbed citizen for a while, and then she could go home. _Hopefully . . ._

* * *

Golden Oak Library stood tall and firm in the centre of Ponyville. Its extravagant branches stretched out overhead of the citizens, thriving with vibrant green leaves and topped off with a busy beehive dangling lazily underneath a thick branch. Although the book shelter was a tree, it was easily recognized as a cozy home with the decorated windows and candle baring door.

Patiently, Lisbon waited for Twilight to welcome her and Jane inside. Their helper had insisted that they wait outside so that she could insure her house wasn't too much of a mess for them.

"Maybe she needs to scrape off old bark or something?" Jane whispered with a small snicker. Lisbon smiled and knocked his shoulder teasingly. Her green eyes sharpened and narrowed, and she was met with a wicked grin from Jane. The stallion started creeping towards her with a cocky grin, and Lisbon shuffled backwards.

"Jane, don't you even think about it."

He crept closer.

"Jane!"

The golden unicorn knocked her to the ground and assaulted her with a storm of unbearable tickles, leaving Lisbon writhing on the ground with no means of escape. The gray mare held her breath and clenched her teeth to try to stop the painful laughter from spilling out of her mouth, but that only led to small snorts and squeals. Soon she was trying to roll away from the determined stallion, doing her best to keep her dignity in between her giggles and waving hooves.

"Jane, this isn't professional!" Though she was trying to be serious, the words lost all their meaning very quickly. There was no way this horse would let up unless she forced him to. _So then why aren't I just pushing him away?_

"I don't think it matters if we are professional or not right now my dear!" Jane joked. Lisbon's cheeks were suddenly burning with a strange racing heat. Instantly, she kicked him off and pulled herself up off the grass, fully aware of the semi hurt look she was receiving from her partner.

Lisbon's hoof crawled up to her cheek. There was a strange fluttering sensation in her stomach and it made her want to cry and sing at the same time. It was . . . uncomfortable, yet nice. She imagined herself on a cold winter night, wrapped tightly in a soft sleeping bag by a fire. Even though it was cold and frozen outside, she was safe and warm in her house.

"Tere- I mean, Lisbon. Would you like to come inside?" Lisbon jumped as Twilight's voice intruded into her, a little too, private thoughts. "Jane's already inside. I've finished tidying up, so there's no reason for you to stay out here anymore.

"Thanks!" Lisbon stammered. She galloped quickly past Twilight, who was graciously holding the door open for the distracted mare. Only after both of the guests had entered her house did Twilight close the door. The inside of the alicorn's home was fancier than either of the two had expected it to be. Even so, the decor was accompanied with a sense of home and belonging. Traditionally carved textures swirled around the footers of the walls, and a strong horse statue stood defiant in the middle of the library. Bookshelves were carefully cut into the walls, useful and fetching.

"I know it may seem like a lot, but it usually only takes me a few hours. With the two of you working together, you should be done in no time!"

The mountainous bookshelves towered over the group, taunting them like a bear over a squirrel. Maybe they had bitten off more than they could chew. Lisbon wasn't even sure she could pick up a book, let alone hundreds. Even though she could feel her determination being sapped away by the daunting task, she set her face straight and stomped her hoof confidently. She was as stubborn as a wild stallion, and nothing was too much for her to handle! Except maybe Patrick Jane. "How would you like us to organize the books?" Lisbon asked, not looking away from the tightly packed shelves.

"I go by alphabetical order and topic. For example, _Star Swirl The Bearded's Guide To Magic_ would go in the magic section, while _Equestrian Society_ would go in the history section. It's rather easy." Twilight brushed her blue bangs out of her eyes, revealing several droplets of glistening sweat, steadily snaking down her temple. "You will be careful with my books, won't you? I don't want them to get ripped or bent. Also, try not to misplace any, or put them int he wrong order, or-"

"We'll be careful." Lisbon cut in. "You can count on Jane and I. He might seem a little on the untrustworthy side, but he puts his all into . . . Actually, scratch that. He's pretty lazy. But he does try to do the right thing, so you can bet that your books will be safe!"

"I'm not lazy!" Jane cut in. His curly blond mane bounced as he jumped in annoyance.

"And if he tries to do anything to your books," Lisbon added. "I'll kick his a-"

"Okay, okay, she gets it! Jeez! I'll be on my best behavior!"

Twilight smiled awkwardly. "I'll leave you two to your job. How about I come back in an hour? I'll just go grab a coffee at the cafe."

Coffee? This world had coffee? Lisbon's heart fluttered, more so than it had when Jane had called her, dear. _What I would do for a cup of coffee!_

"Alright, we'll see you then." Jane responded while waving a hoof in farewell. The sound of trotting followed by a closing door signaled to Lisbon that the alicorn princess had left. Lisbon turned around to see Jane staring at the bookshelves that surrounded them. His shoulders looked tense with unease.

"Why don't we do this one step at a time?" Lisbon said, walking up beside Jane. He turned his head to face her, a small smile creeping up his face. "First we can get all the books off the shelves, and then we can reorganize them on the empty shelves."

After a quick nod the two of them got to the task. But it was hard to remain gentle with the pieces of literature. Lisbon dropped more books than she would admit, but she wasn't alone in her klutziness anymore, for Jane followed suit. Time and time again, the books would slip between their new hooves and drop to the floor. It took a full twenty minutes just to get the books off the shelf. And by then, the two of them were frustrated and ready to give up.

"I knew this was a bad idea!" Lisbon growled as she shifted through the multitude of books that had carpeted the ground. Hard as it was to navigate through the ocean of literature, she managed to keep the book she had collected in her hooves. Luckily, she didn't lose it this time before she got to the shelf.

"What are you talking about? This was your idea in the first place! Don't try to blame this one on me!" Jane barked, temper fuming.

"Well I'm sorry if I'm in a bad mood!" The new book she had picked up slipped out of her hooves and she let out a hoarse groan. "I've had it with these stupid books!"

Kicking one to the side, Jane snorted. Twilight's warning had been long forgotten by this point. All that mattered was that they got the books onto the shelves in a somewhat organized fashion. Then, they could go back to Sugarcube Corner with some money.

"Once we get the rest of the books on the shelves, we're done. Let's just stay calm, alright? If you pick them up with your mouth you won't keep dropping them." Jane picked up a book in his teeth and carried it over to the magic shelf. He could only hope he had gotten the placement right considering his knowledge on magic was somewhat lacking.

"I am calm!" Lisbon retorted, snatching a book in her teeth she stomped over to the history shelf and slammed it into place with a few others that were already lazily slumped against each other. Her mouth tasted like dank paper, and her tongue felt rough and bumpy. "I hate all of this! I just want my hands back!"

Jane shrugged and picked up another book in his hooves. He quickly searched for the right shelf, only to come to a complete halt. There was no way to reach it, no way unless he used the ladder. His gaze shifted towards the ladder resting in the corner of the room. But it was too risky to try to climb a ladder when he was just learning to work with his new body. There had to be another way. And he knew exactly what to do. He threw the book on the floor in front of him.

"Lisbon, I'm going to try and use magic." He said. Lisbon returned his gaze with a look of disbelief. She didn't need to say anything, he could tell she was thinking, _Are you nuts? You don't even know anything about magic!_ But that didn't matter. What mattered was that if he could use just a little bit of magic, then they would get their money. And maybe it could help them out in the future.

Jane shifted his hooves so that he felt as sturdy as a boulder. Focusing on the book in front of him, he clenched his teeth and strained his mind to block everything else out. A coolness stretched through his body, the lazy river of magic energy coursed through his being and he fought to force the aura up to his horn. If only he had the cool and calm control that his bossy partner wielded so easily.

 _Maybe it will be easier if I break it down?_ Jane thought, not letting his chain of thought trail too far from the writhing strands of magic.

 _Step 1 . . . Pick up the book._

Even though Jane was giving it his all, the lone book in front of him didn't budge. Biting down the impatience drilling its way into his mind, he forced himself to keep trying.

 _Step 1 . . . Pick up the-_

"Book!" He cried out as a blast of blue beams shot from his horn. Jane shut his eyes and cut off his magic, shutting down the blue streams sprouting from his horn. After a moment of silence, he dared to look again, and what he saw amazed him. The book was floating in the air! And he was controlling it! "Lisbon! I did it!"

Shaking herself out of her daze, Lisbon nodded in awe. Jane had somehow mastered his magic in only a few minutes, not even! How was that even possible?

As Jane boastfully picked up book after book with his magic and set them on the shelves correctly, sometimes in multiples at a time, Lisbon found herself getting agitated by the constant comments the stallion made.

"Lisbon! I can even move the ladder with my magic! It's so strong!"

"Don't you wish you were a unicorn?"

"Look, I can put away ten books at once!"

"I'm glad I don't have to pick these up with my mouth! Paper tastes horrible, you know?"

"Yes, I know Jane!" Lisbon growled, spitting out the book she had been carrying in her teeth. "And you know what else I've figured out? Unicorns are lazy know it alls!" Stomping towards the perplexed unicorn, she grabbed the books in his magical grasp.

"You can't take those! They go on the top shelf!" Jane barked as the books were swept from his hold. He watched as she struggled to carry the three books in her hooves and mouth while she made her way to the ladder.

"Lisbon, that's a bad idea!"

"Shut it! I know what I can and can't do!" The gray earth mare shouted as she shakily stacked the two books from her hooves onto her head and stepped up onto the ladder. Lisbon locked her jaws shut, making sure that she didn't let the book slip as she crawled up the ladder on new hooves. Slowly, with the tower wobbling atop her head, she made her way up the rocking ladder. And soon, she was perched at the very top. Looking downwards, she spotted Jane staring up at her from about two meters down below. The world started swirling as she realized how high she was. Sucking in a quick breath, she began to take the books off her head. But the world tilted before she could even put on away.

Lisbon let out a yelp as her back hoof slipped and she began to fall. The ladder kicked out from underneath her, slamming into the bookshelf and causing a storm of books to follow her as she dropped and hit the floor with a loud _thud_!

A deathly chill crawled through Jane's spine as he waited for his friend to emerge from the fresh pile of books and dust. _What if she's hurt?_

A small mumble escaped from the prison of books. Instantly the cell exploded, revealing Lisbon sitting dumbfounded in the middle. Jane levitated the books back onto the shelf before racing over and lending her a hoof to help her up, but he nearly cried out when she shoved it aside and stumbled up on her own.

The two of them finished their job in silence. Jane cast a few glances now and again at Lisbon, but at one point their eyes had connected, and that had ended it. Finally, when all the books were put away, they were forced into a conversation by the screaming silence that rang in both their ears.

"What got into you back there?" Jane started, resting a gentle hoof on Lisbon's now bruised shoulder. At the sight of her wincing, he pulled back guiltily. But the glare she shot him stung much more. "Come to think of it . . . You've been really irritable lately. Even before the transformation."

"There's nothing wrong Jane! I can take care of myself! I don't need you to baby me!" Lisbon turned her head with a huff, refusing to look at her consultant. "Everyone seems to think that I can't take care of myself because I'm a girl!"

"That's not true!" Lisbon's heart skipped a beat at Jane's words. But her happiness was short lived, for his reassurance was followed by, "It's because you're small."

"That's it!" She howled! "I can't stand you anymore! You think you're so great because you have a horn and magical powers! Well you know what? I don't care!"

"You're just jealous because you're stuck as a boring mare!"

Lisbon clenched her teeth and struggled not to slap the arrogant horse in the face right then and there. "Just stay out of my business, okay?!"

Jane was about to answer when the door to the library clicked and swung open. Twilight Sparkle trotted in with two steaming cups of coffee and a bag of bits held in her purple magic. A large smile crept onto her face as she took in the house and the neatly arranged books. "I knew you could do it!" She cheered, clapping her front hooves together merrily. "I got you drinks and collected your bits from the the Ponyville bank!"

Jane and Lisbon settled themselves down and mingled with the Twilight for about an hour, doing their best to remain polite and not show their frustration with each other. Neither of them touched their drinks as they talked to Twilight about their "magic shows", and when the time came for them to depart, they didn't complain.

* * *

The night sky glittered, lit by the theatre of twinkling stars placed perfectly by the princess of the night. Moonlight shone through the window and shed soft light on the dark basement.

Jane carried the bag of bits in his mouth. He was somewhat proud of their prize. He had learned how to use his magic, and Lisbon had . . . well, Lisbon hadn't gotten much out of it. But together, they had earned one hundred bits! He set their cash on the bedside table as Lisbon entered the room. Sending him a glare, she grabbed the top cover from the perfectly set bed and threw it on the ground at his hooves. He gave her a quizzical look as she settled onto the bed and turned to face the other way.

The message was loud and clear in Jane's ears. He was sleeping on the floor. Straightening the blanket, he set it across the ground and crawled on top. Expertly, he used his magic and wrapped the remaining material overtop of him. Even in the darkness of their room, he could see her curved shape under the covers. It was easy to tell that she was holding her cross necklace in her hooves by the way her shoulders rocked and the quiet whispering that escaped her lips. She was afraid of something, and she wouldn't tell him what it was because of her ego. This mare would surely be the death of him.

The two knew that they wouldn't sleep that night. Lisbon would spend another night fighting off the demons that attacked in the silence at night, and Jane would face the same. If only there was a warm glass of milk for them to run to . . .

* * *

Twilight yawned as Spike waited for her to start talking. He bore a quill in one claw, and a parchment in the other. "Twilight, are you sure that you have to report to Princess Celestia tonight? I'm tired . . ." The dragon stifled a yawn as well, and Twilight chuckled before returning to her serious nature.

"I'm sorry Spike, but this must be done. It's very important. Based on what you told me, these two ponies are in fact the ones we are looking for."

"They didn't seem that bad. I mean, they fought a lot, but it was mostly playful banter." Spike said lazily, stretching his fingers before placing the quill in ready position. Then, Twilight started,

 _Dear: Princess Celestia_

 _I would like to report to you about my latest findings on the ponies who broke into our world. I believe I have found them in Ponyville. Although they don't seem dangerous, it is almost certain that they are the ones we are looking for. There is a mare and a stallion by the names of Patrick Jane and Teresa Lisbon. Neither of them have their cutiemarks, and they claim to be from Canterlot. The mare (Lisbon) was in hoofcuffs when we found them, but the stallion (Jane) said that he had tried a magic trick and lost the keys. I invited them over and had Spike listen from upstairs as they worked, believing they were alone. He tells me that they spoke of a transformation, and that the stallion learned how to use magic surprisingly fast. Spike also noted that he was very good at it. Furthermore, their lack of knowledge about Equestria is astounding. I will continue to watch them._

 _Your faithful student: Twilight Sparkle._


	4. Chapter 4: Every Rose Has Its Thorns

**Every** **Rose** **Has Its Thorns**

"So this is your apology?" Lisbon grunted. The partners were seated at an outside cafe just in the center of Ponyville. Casual chatter floated around them as they waited for their server. The only thing that they had done so far that day was share complaints with each other. Lisbon had a sharp tongue, that was for sure. But she only used it when she was angry. That said, she _was_ angry at the moment . . . and most of the time.

Putting up his hooves in an overdramatic surrender to her retort, Jane said, "We couldn't afford anything else. I'm using the money that's supposed to go towards the rent!" His blue eyes sharpened as he saw Lisbon start to relax. This game wasn't over yet. "I'm sorry princess. I'd take you to a fancy restaurant if I could." He scrunched up his face and gave her a lovey-dovey pout.

"Don't you try to feed me that crap! The only time you take me to fancy restaurants is when it's part of one of your elaborate schemes. May I add you've already gotten me fired before? Not to mention suspended from my job!"

Rolling his eyes, Jane waved her bitterness away. "Yeah, but that was a whole year ago. Plus, I got you your job back anyway."

Fighting the urge to bang her head on the table, Lisbon snarled, "Yeah, by threatening the boss with your attitude." She tried to keep a straight face, she honestly did; but the rolling anger inside of her was sliding away and being replaced by a bubbly warmth. Imagine that, a man who could blackmail others using his annoying personality.

Sunlight penetrated the light cloud cover and shone brightly against Lisbon's eyes. She shut them against the harsh rays, but couldn't help smiling at the feeling of sun on her skin.

Jane's pout gave way to round eyes and an open mouth. Lisbon was wearing a sincere smile and laughing, completely oblivious to the fluttering heart beating rapidly inside his chest. Despite his efforts he couldn't rip his eyes away from her. Dark brown bangs sloped just over her eyes, and the bottom of her mane was perfectly curled and shining golden in the sunlight. Then, she opened her eyes. Those bright green orbs had the ability to trap anything in their beauty. They were the pure essence of nature itself.

"Why are you staring at me like that?" Lisbon snapped, utterly shattering the vision Jane had carefully painted in his head.

"I'm not!" Jane panicked for the first time in a while. Usually he could always find something to say to get him out of an awkward situation, but it was different with her. She had the power to send him into a tongue tied state of humiliation.

"I swear, if you called me a princess again, I'm going to-"

"I was just thinking about how nice it is to see you happy for once. I don't think you have smiled since we got here."

Lisbon furrowed her brow and crossed her hooves with distaste. "What does that matter? You don't get to choose when I do and do not smile."

"Just be quiet and look at your menu." Jane chided teasingly, pushing the small booklet over to her. She stared at it for a few moments, her eyes scanning over the words. Pictures of sandwiches, soups, and salads littered the pages.

The menu held plates that Lisbon had never even heard of, and not in a good way. She had to hold back a groan of agitation for not seeing this coming. The cafe served everything from an aurinia sandwich to a bowl of zinnia petal salad. The drinks weren't any better. _I don't want a hayshake!_

"May I take your orders?"

So caught up in reading the menu, Lisbon hadn't noticed the waiter stop at their table. The stallion was light blue and dressed in a white suit, complete with a puffy hat that fit snuggly on his head. The shape of the chef hat reminded Lisbon of a muffin, but she kept her mouth shut. To her surprise, Jane ordered a daisy sandwich and a hayshake. When the waiter turned expectantly to her, she guiltily shied away and closed her menu politely.

"I'll just have a glass of water thanks." The waiter nodded, satisfied, and used his magic to retrieve the two menus on their table. _So he's hiding a horn beneath that hat!_

"You didn't eat yesterday, and now you aren't ordering food?" Jane narrowed his eyes and leaned forward, resting his hooves on the mushroom table.

Lisbon shrugged, a surge of defensive energy lit in the pit of her stomach. "It isn't my fault that you dragged me out to catch a serial killer who ended up sending us into a magical world filled with talking equines." Lisbon tried to stare Jane down, narrowing her eyes into a menacing glare, but their competition was interrupted by a rumbling sound from under the table. Lisbon blushed as Jane smirked. "I'm just . . . a little hungry! But I'm fine!"

"If we're stuck here, we might as well try their food. Don't forget, our bodies changed when we were transported here. Our digestive systems are built for these meals now. Not hamburgers and coffee." Jane licked his lips at the thought of eating. Inside, his stomach churned greedily, waiting for food to devour.

Resting her head on her hooves, Lisbon lost herself in her own thoughts. _But why did Red John send us here? He could have sent us anywhere with that creepy mirror right? So why somewhere as peaceful as Ponyville?_

"Hey Jane, I wanted to ask you something." The unicorn was caught off guard by Lisbon's sudden reluctance, but leaned in respectively. His wide blue eyes did little to help her flustered state. Instinctively, her hooves moved to her necklace, and she cradled it, petting the golden cross as if it were a dog. "Do you think Red John can see us right now?" New born fear shifted in Lisbon's eyes, and she bit he lip anxiously.

That possibility was something Jane had been considering himself. He hadn't planned on talking about it with Lisbon, knowing it would make her skittish. Control was what she craved after all. The only time he had ever really seen her cry was when she couldn't control anything around her as it was all crashing down. That was two years ago, and they still never talked about it.

 _Maybe I can tiptoe around it and drive her away from the question. I don't know if I'm ready to answer it myself . . ._

"I want it straight." Lisbon said, cutting right through his half cooked plan. "No shortcuts, no reassurance. I just want it straight."

 _Who was I kidding?_ Letting out a sigh that he hadn't known he had built up, Jane said, "I think he's watching everything we do . . . Like he said before, he's testing how far our partnership can stretch. I can't say I know the extent of his control over what happens here though. Maybe he can just watch, and maybe he can go so far as to interact with Equestria."

Lisbon stared in silence for a few moments, piecing what Jane said together. Her features visibly darkened, and his beautiful angel fell. "So he's seeing how much our friendship can take before it breaks?"

Jane nodded and they sat in silence. The sunlight had clouded over by now, and a slight breeze was whistling through Ponyville. Pegasi were bringing in clouds for the scheduled cool evening ahead of them. Some of the ponies that had been enjoying their breakfast had left, leaving only Jane, Lisbon, and one other couple. By the time the waiter came back with Jane and Lisbon's breakfast, neither of them were very hungry.

Minutes passed without another word being spoken, so Jane settled on eating his daisy sandwich in silence. It tasted alright, surprisingly. The sweetness of the flower combined with the soft dull taste of bread created a soothing yet vibrant flavor that tasted somewhat like a lemon that had lost its sour.

"I don't want our partnership to end."

The bite of sandwich Jane had been swallowing caught in his throat at the sound of Lisbon's mumbled words. Snatching his hayshake he gulped it down mercilessly, washing down the clump.

Lisbon watched Jane recover from his shock, not repenting the words she had said for a second. "We can get through this, right? We're not going to fall apart?"

Jane wiped his mouth with his hoof and cleared his throat. "No, we aren't."

She cast the worrisome thought aside, allowing the smallest smile to pull at her lips. All Lisbon wanted to do was focus on was her apology meal, or in this case, her apology glass of water. She reached out to grab the drink, only to stop and lean back. _How do you pick up a glass with hooves?_ Looking over the table, she watched as Jane expertly used his magic to drink and eat his sandwich without a care in the world. _Maybe I am a little jealous . . ._

Determinedly, Lisbon wrapped both of her hooves around the clear water filled glass. Slowly she brought it to her lips and tipped it so that the water slid down her throat easily. The wet touch of the light liquid made her stomach cheer. Relishing the icy cold, she took one more small sip before setting the cup back down and wiping her mouth with as much dignity as a horse could have. When she looked back up at her partner, he was holding back a snicker. "What?" She demanded, slamming her hoof on the table.

"You look so awkward when you try to drink!" Jane laughed, his eyes watering. Heat flushed through Lisbon's cheeks and she lowered her head. "Oh come on now, let me help you." The glass started glowing blue and floated up to Lisbon's face. Pushing it away with her muzzle, she snarled, "I don't need you to feed me!"

"I was just trying to help." Jane muttered as the gray mare stole the cup from his levitation. "Sometimes you need to let go of your pride." She only answered him with a grunt before tilting the glass again, only for her hoof to slip. Lisbon squealed as the glass dropped to the grass and shattered, her legs and stomach were soaked through to the skin, tinging her gray fur black.

"Well now we have to pay extra." Jane slipped off his chair and carefully picked up the shards of glass lodged into the grass. With delicate precision, he collected the clear fragments and placed them on the table in front of Lisbon. Then, he slid next to her. She shied away in protest as the stallion scooted onto her seat, but didn't argue. "Can I see your hooves?"

"I don't need you to baby me, I can take care of myself just fine! I always have!" Guilt and longing pricked at Lisbon's heart like a needle. She had always taken care of herself, even when she was little. It was hard sometimes, and lonely, but she had managed to get a job in law enforcement, and even work her way up to the role of senior agent. She couldn't have made it that far if she wasn't able to handle herself! She had threaded her life together without any assistance! Then again, Jane knew all of this. And maybe, just maybe, it wouldn't be so bad to get _some_ help once in a while. So, Lisbon swallowed her pride and showed Jane her hooves. Remnants of the glass had embedded themselves in her skin, but there wasn't any blood and the wounds were small, barely large enough to be considered as scratches.

Jane took Lisbon's hooves in his own and slowly looked them over. His heart pulsed rapidly against his ribs, making his chest throb. Heat spread through Jane's body as he slid his hoof over Lisbon's as if she was made of cracked porcelain.

Lisbon decided it was best not to look at Jane as he proceeded to remove the remains of the glass. Her face felt hot as his hoof rode over her tender skin searching for the tiny fragments, and she almost squeaked as a sudden twinge shivered through her stomach. She felt ticklish and squeamish. Soon, the need to look at Jane again was unbearable. When she gave in to her foreign desire, she was taken aback by the ocean blue eyes looking up at her; She struggled not to drown in their drawing depths, but part of her didn't think that was such a bad fate.

"I . . ." Lisbon couldn't think of anything to say to her consultant, she couldn't even bring herself to give him some kind of sassy remark. She was frozen, paralyzed by his touch. and appearance, and even his smell. Why did he have to be so damn good at infatuating people!

 _Being in this crazy town must be messing with my head!_

Although Lisbon tried to cast her previous emotions to sea, she was still plagued by Jane's smokey pine aroma. Images of forests flooded her thoughts, rising up around her like towers. Everything felt perfect, she was the last stitch in Jane's life quilt. Together, they were the perfect team! Unstoppable! But maybe they could be . . . more?

 _Stop it mind! What are you doing?!_

"Lisbon, I'm done." Jane said.

Lisbon drew her hoof back and inspected it. Sure enough, all the glass was out. Looking back to Jane, her eyes wavering between his smiling face, and his blond mane. Without thinking, she reached out and let her hoof roam through the waves on his head. Was it wrong to want to know what someone's mane felt like?

"Sorry to disappoint you, but you can play with my mane when we get back home. First I have to pay for breakfast and that glass you broke."

Lisbon almost choked as her mind broke out of her amorous trance, she tugged her hooves back to her body quickly. "As if! I was only . . . checking to see if you had lice! I don't want you so close to me if you're infected!"

Jane backed away and waltzed to his side of the table, giving her a look of torturous teasing. His eyes were narrowed slightly, and he walked with a tantalizing sway that almost hypnotized her. _Maybe this apology breakfast wasn't so bad . . ._

* * *

"I take it I'm forgiven?" Jane smiled as Lisbon climbed onto the double bed in the middle of their room. When she nodded, he pulled himself up beside her and his horn lit up. Lisbon watched in wonder as the box of leftovers from the restaurant floated up beside them. Flicking the cover off with his hoof, he passed her the remaining half of his daisy sandwich. Immediately Lisbon scrunched her face and tried to push it away, but Jane didn't take no for an answer that easily. "I promise, it isn't actually that bad. You need to eat something." When Lisbon's stomach growled, he only smirked and gave her an _'I told you so'_ wink.

"I swear, I'll send my stomach to limbo after this." Smothering the last of her pride, Lisbon took the, what she considered to be, weed sandwich from his levitation. Taking a bite, she chewed, and swallowed. It was . . . Good actually. Quickly devouring the rest of the sandwich, she licked her lips and said a swift thank you to the man that had saved her roaring belly.

"Don't think this means that you aren't sleeping on the ground tonight." Lisbon snickered

"I wouldn't dream of it." Jane said, before Lisbon shoved him off the bed.


	5. Chapter 5: Water Is Purer Than Blood

**Water Is Purer Than** **Blood**

The day progressed slowly. Second after second ticked by, and every tick felt like an hour; Every hour, like a year. Lisbon still lay sprawled across the bed. The sun gleamed against the window and shone brightly against her eyes, making her shut them with distaste. Rolling over, she threw a blanket over her and growled an inaudible threat. A snicker from the other side of the room made her throw off the covers once again. She whirled around as Jane shook his head.

"You can't blame the sun for your bad attitude." he said. He held what looked like a calendar in his hooves.

"I don't have to when I have you around all the time." she snapped back, suddenly aware that she was being unreasonably edgy to the man that had given her his sandwich less than an hour ago. "Sorry . . ."

"What was that?" Jane brought a hoof to his ear and smirked, only making Lisbon's bad temper sky rocket.

"Jane, I swear I will kick you and your bare flank to the moon if you so much as think about pulling that trick on me!" Glaring at him, she dared the stallion to say something, but he had already become absorbed in his own thoughts once again.

Slightly disappointed with how short their squabble had been, Lisbon departed the bed and disappeared into the washroom. Upon entering, she prepared to get rid of her clothes, but quickly remembered that she had none.

 _Less work on my part . . ._

Sliding the still sanitary curtains aside, she leaned into the shower and started up the water. A loud _hiss_ momentarily erupted from the nozzle before a stream of droplets poured from overhead. Remembering her not so pleasant experience with her last shower, Lisbon carefully snuck her hoof under the water and checked the temperature. Only then did she slip into the cascading warm water.

* * *

"Jane, I swear I will kick you and your bare flank to the moon if you so much as think about pulling that trick on me!"

Lisbon's shout sounded raw in the small room. Jane quickly diverted his gaze back to his calendar as she shot him a challenging frown. Sweat trickled down his brow as his eyes tracked up and down the page meaninglessly. _Don't say, it, don't say it . . ._

The dead silence screamed at him to shoot back a sly remark, but he forced his lips to stay closed. Thankfully, Lisbon's tolerance was far from superb, and her patience was worse. With a frustrated sound somewhere between a growl and scream, she stomped to the bathroom and slammed the door.

"I'd like to go to the moon."

Even though no one was around to hear his witty comeback, it made him feel a bit better inside. His tense shoulders fell, and he dropped the calendar beside his bed. _Why is she so grumpy all of a sudden?_ With a sigh, he packed the abandoned calendar into the bedside table's drawer and walked towards the bathroom door on light hooves. Pressing his body against the wood he listened carefully to the beating water on the other side. It was time.

Dashing over to the table, Jane scooped up the money bag in his mouth, wincing at the _clink_ - _clank_ of overturning bits. His body froze, and the rustling bag in his teeth went still. Expectantly, he stared wide eyes at the bathroom door, expecting it to burst open any second with his angry boss stomping out wearing the face of a demon.

Seconds passed, then minutes. Gradually, Jane peeled out of his cautious trance and snuck out the door. He would be quick.

* * *

The water soaked through Lisbon's sleek gray fur. It, rather unpleasantly, stuck between her skin and short hair instead of just rolling off. Heat boiled in her cheeks, not from her recent argument, but from her situation in general. Slamming her hoof against the tiled wall, she gritted her teeth. _So what if Red John thinks he can push us around! He can't! We have everything under control! Everything . . ._

Sucking back a breath, she focused on the cascading water around her. She brought her hooves up to her mane and messaged it graciously, not stopping even after her head was cleansed through and through.

 _I just need to calm down! I can't let Red John get the upper hand! We don't know if he can see us! It's only a possibility._

Letting her hooves fall to her sides, she stood motionless in the middle of the shower on her hind legs. Here she was stuck in Equestria with Jane while the team, _her_ team, was back in California doing who knows what. They had been in the middle of an investigation! Now, the boss, along with the most keen member of the CBI, had vanished! They could be sending out search parties!

Warm water dripped off her dark brown mane and splashed against her muzzle and cheeks. Steady drips taped against the floor and disappeared into small lake under Lisbon's hooves. Water swirled and pulsed as it gurgled down the shower drain. She could feel her hope faltering. She tried to grab it, but it always seemed to slip away right when she was close to being happy again.

The morning sun was still fresh in Lisbon's mind. She had felt light and fluffy while at that breakfast with Jane, and then, she got anxious again. The covers couldn't hide her from it either, and for once, neither could being around another person, or pony in this case. Worst of all, no one knew what she was feeling. Other agents just dismissed it as her being snappy and mean hearted; She didn't have the confidence to tell them otherwise.

"I'm pathetic." She laughed a little at how self-absorbed and hollow she sounded. "Just pathetic. I mean really. Being beaten by something that happened when I was a kid? And now, being beaten by some little assumption that Red John is 'watching' us? Wow Lisbon, you really are something."

 _"That's me, cool and calm"_

"Had I really said that before?" Letting out a sight, she reached for the tap and turned it down, cutting off the water immediately. But, she didn't get out of the shower, not even when the cold shop air began to bite at her hidden skin. Instead, she collapsed behind the curtains, and pulled herself into a ball, cradled in the corner of the shower.

Disguised tears crept down her cheeks, icy cold compared to the hot trails of shower water. The screeching of an ambulance alarm pounded in her head. She could still see the flashing light that penetrated the dark city.

Medics dragged a white gurney through the crowd of curious bystanders. The bed was covered with a dirty white blanket tugged over a hidden body. Just to the side were two crashed vehicles, along with a drunk man yelling at a police officer.

The man held out his bottle of beer, leaking at the sides due to some cracks, and laughed. The officer ignored him and snapped a pair of handcuffs around his wrists before leading him to the police car and stuffing him in the back seat.

A young girl struggled through the crowd. Bodies brushed against her on all sides, throwing her in different directions. But she needed to find her dad, or mom, or anybody! She cried out hoarsely, voice lost in the crowd that piled over her. The sirens roared in her throbbing ears. She just wanted to go home!

Like a murder of crows around a body, the crowd eventually thinned out. The younger Lisbon weaved her way around the taller men and women, before she found herself at the edge of the chaos. She could finally see what the fuss was about.

The first thing her eyes were welcomed by was the gurney sitting in the open ambulance. An arm was hanging out limply, just dangling like a worm on a hook. Quickly averting her eyes, she saw the man sitting in the back of the police car. His face was contorted with rage, not a bottle of alcohol was in sight.

Heart thumping, Lisbon just stared. What was she supposed to make of this? An hour ago she was sitting at home with a blanket and pillow, awaiting her mother's return. Now, she was standing in the middle of a disaster zone.

She didn't know why, but when the ambulance's doors closed, she cried.

 _That was the day my mother died . . ._

 ** _TAP TAP TAP_**

Lisbon jumped. Her head turned towards where the door was hidden behind the curtain. Quickly wiping away the remaining tears she flew out of the shower and opened the door, still dripping wet. Jane awaited on the other side. For a moment his eyes looked dark, but then he was smiling.

"Hey, I was wondering when you were coming out. The water stopped a while ago." His voice was edgy and cautious, like he was scared she would bark at him again. She couldn't blame him.

Lisbon shuffled on her feet. "I'm done now, if you need to go in." Stepping to the side, she gave Jane room to pass.

"I don't need the washroom, I need you." He said sneakily, closing the bathroom door with his magic. "Come on, let's go for a walk. It'll be good to get out of the room. We can't just stay here all day."

Lisbon watched as he headed towards the door that led to the rest of Sugarcube Corner, but she stayed put. "I don't really want to go on a walk right now Jane. I just want to lie down for a bit." Without looking at him, she headed towards the bed with unsteady, and still dripping hooves. She had almost gotten to her desired location when she found herself unable to advance any farther.

 _What?_

The world around her had suddenly been enveloped in blue sparkles and waving currents. "Sorry Lisbon, but I won't take no for an answer. Besides, if we stay here all day we won't ever get out of this world."

"I just want to be by myself right now! Leave me alone!" Lisbon struggled in Jane's magic, fighting the strange energy that had engulfed her. But fighting an aura is like trying to walk underwater. She felt herself bobbing up and down ever so slightly, but it was enough to throw her off balance. Without a floor to set her hooves on, all she could do was float.

"Will you come with me now?"

"Jane, I'm your boss! Put me down, now!" She was on the verge of screaming and crying. Frustration spilled over her as Jane only shrugged in response.

 ** _"Jane!"_**

The magic bubble popped and Lisbon crashed to the ground. Rubbing her head, she let out a moan and narrowed her eyes. "Alright, you win. I'll go on a walk with you." With a lash of her tail, she lifted herself off the ground and stormed out the door. Jane frowned before following close behind. _This plan isn't off to a great start, but that was expected._

* * *

Sunlight cut through small slits in the clouds as Jane led his less than cheery boss along the river trail. He could hear the steady dragging of her hooves; And every time she growled it sent shivers down his spine. He could feel the daggers she was shooting into the back of his head, and he gulped at the thought of turning around and facing her wrath head on.

 _I can't believe I ever considered her to be the voice of reason! She's more like the voice of hot headedness!_ His chest tightened and he slowed his pace, behind him the sound of scraping dirt slipped into a slow thudding. _Lisbon hasn't been the same lately . . . I can see it in her eyes. They're dark and distracted. She's been this way for a while now . . . What kind of psychic am I if can't tell what's wrong with her? Oh right, a fake one. Psychics don't exist . . ._

"Jane, why are we walking the speed of a turtle?" Lisbon galloped ahead, looking down at the river. Her dull eyes followed the small ripples, and gradually lightened. A faint smile turned turned up her lips. "The river is so clear here, unlike back home." Her voice held a far off wonder, more surprised than happy. But it lit up his heart anyway, dissolving the dark worry that had started to rope around him. He would ask her what was wrong later.

Trotting up to Lisbon's side and staring down at the water, Jane held his breath. Beneath the glimmering lazy surface rested the bottom of the river, completely visible and undisturbed by the usual wrappers and grime that they were used to. Waving along the water's top were their reflections, staring back at them with wide curious eyes.

"Hey Lisbon?" Jane said, not breaking his gaze away from his reflection.

"What?" She continued to stare as well.

"What if on the other side of the water their is another world, but our reflections are blocking us from getting there?"

A huff sounded beside him, and then, a laugh. "Really? You actually found a way to make reflections seem creepy? Has anyone ever told you that you're nuts?" Shoving his shoulder teasingly. Her gaze fell back to her reflection, and she slowly moved her hoof back and forth just above the water. _Reflections blocking you from another world? Hah! Yeah right!_

"Usually, they call me something like annoying, or . . . _That Guy_. But nuts? No, not usually."

Another chorus of laughter erupted from the pair. Reaching over, Jane scooped Lisbon up in a hug. He didn't care that she had stopped laughing as soon as he had grabbed her. He could feel her cheeks radiating heat, and her heart thump in her chest. Her front hooves rested almost defensively against his chest, separating them just enough. But he didn't care.

"Thanks Jane. And, I'm sorry . . . ."

He shook his head and released her from the hug, letting her slide away with an awkward smirk. She rubbed her right hoof nervously, and he reached over, resting his own against it. "I've said this before, but I'm here for you if you want to talk. I understand that you aren't used to letting people in, but I'm here, okay?"

Lisbon nodded, and got to her hooves. Looking ahead, she narrowed her eyes. "Jane, we should be getting back to Sugarcube Corner. The sun is going to start setting soon."

A cold breeze ruffled Jane's fur, and he looked up from where he was sitting. Far off in the distance, the sky had already forfeited its fight against the sun; The night was coming. If only he could stop it, just this once.

In the quiet, a robin chirped, leaving a vast silence in its wake. It felt like they had been walking for hours. The sun left the sky a while ago, and a giant moon watched as Jane and Lisbon carefully followed the river back to Ponyville.

"Are you sure we're going the right way?" Lisbon muttered, shaking her head wearily. Her bangs had started to droop over her face, and the usual bags under her eyes had become much more defined.

"I know it is, trust me. We're just tired is all. So it feels longer." Jane replied, his voice slightly wavering.

"You don't know how ' _reassuring'_ that is to hear." Growling under her breath, Lisbon forced herself into a steady trot. All she wanted to do was get back home, and slip into bed. Her muscles ached from the long walk, and her mind felt heavy as a dictionary.

Silence wrapped over them once again. Only the sound of their hooves against dirt filled the night.

 ** _Clip-Clop Clip-Clop Clip-Clop Cli-_**

The world lurched as Lisbon's hoof caught on a hidden rock. Losing her balance, she slammed hard onto the packed ground below. Jane rushed to catch up with her immediately. his hooves pounding loud in the silence.

Groaning, Lisbon rubbed her eyes clear of the rough dirt. But something was off. She felt bare and exposed. Her hooves traveled to her neck to grab her cross, but they were welcomed with nothing. There was no cross for her to grab!

"Jane! It's gone!"

Terror pulsed right through her body and she crawled towards the waters edge. She slapped at the water, hoping that her necklace would somehow end up in her hooves, but all she could do was make things worse. The clear water turned choppy, rippled, and completely opaque.

Pulling her away from the water, Jane set her down and squeezed her shoulder. He held her there patiently, until she calmed down enough to stop squirming. Still breathing hard, she stared shakily into his blue eyes and shifted back and forth.

"My necklace. I tripped, It, f-fell. I think it's in the water!"

As Lisbon crumpled to the ground, Jane trotted over to the water. It had regained its usual splendor by now, clear and see through. Squinting his eyes and scanning the surface, he searched determinedly for Lisbon's golden cross. It had to be around, there wasn't anything around that. Yet, as he searched, he could feel his pulse rising. The steady thud bounced in his neck and against his ribs. Hope faltering, Jane plunged into the river and dived down towards the sandy bottom. Carefully, he ran his hoof over the soft floor in hopes that he would bump against Lisbon's beloved necklace.

Lungs screaming, and chest aching, he franticly scoured the area. With a final shifting of his hoof, he felt something solid tap against him. Recognizing the cold metal immediately, he let the thin golden chain wrap delicately around his hoof, before pulling it up to the surface.

The calm river shattered into a shower of droplets as Jane broke the surface. With strong hooves, he paddled to shore and pulled himself up. He was cold, and dripping from horn to hooves. The night air poked at him tauntingly.

Lisbon sprinted towards him, crying, and smothered him in a tight squeeze. "You idiot! You idiot! Why would you jump in like that?"

Gently pushing Lisbon away, he showed her the necklace dangling from his hoof. "I'm fine, Lisbon. It's just water." He said proudly. "And guess what, I got your necklace! So you owe me big time." Raising the hoof with the wet necklace, he smiled. "Now how about we get this back on, a little tighter this time, and go on home?"

Lisbon nodded with a smile and let Jane walk around behind her. Carefully, he set her mane to the side and pulled the two strands of gold together. While he carefully adjusted the necklace around her neck, he let himself breathe in Lisbon's scent. It was a rare privilege, and he wasn't about to waste it. He would savor her bold cinnamon scent as long as he could. And he knew she wouldn't interrupt him. By the way her ears twitched, he guessed that she was enjoying this too.

"You're mother got you this, right?"

Swallowing, Lisbon nodded slowly. "Yeah, she did. I got it from her when I was little. This was the last thing she ever gave me," Ducking her head and letting out a cough, she stammered, "Right then, we should get going. I don't know about you, but it's freezing out here." As she spoke, a cold wind broke through the air and twisted around them. But Lisbon found that her cheeks were still warm.

"Hey, I'm the one who's all wet!" Laughing, Jane began to lead the way back to Ponyville. This time, they were guided by the faint, but warm, lights. Though their laughter filled the night, they could still hear the chirping of a robin.

* * *

The door creaked open as Jane and Lisbon slugged into the dark room, their hooves tiredly dragging on the pink carpet.

Ready to slip under the covers, Lisbon jumped onto the bed, only to find a small brown box already resting on top of the it. Grin slipping from her face, she turned to Jane who only shrugged and bounced up to rest beside her, failing to hide his proud smirk. "You should open it." He said, impatiently poking her shoulder.

Snorting, Lisbon shoved him away and narrowed her eyes down at the box. The cardboard wasn't thick, but there was no way to see inside. Cautiously she tapped it with her nose. Then, she slipped her hoof under the lid, and nudged it up only slightly. Nothing exploded, but a sweet smell wafted out and filled the room. It was surgery and strong, but not overpowering. Licking her lips, she threw off the lid, all apprehension lost, and **_squeed_** at her prize.

A pink cupcake, decorated carefully with candy hearts and sprinkles sat patiently in the box. Beside it was an empty ring of frosting. A sigh came from the deflated stallion next to her, "Well, I guess mine is gone."

At his words, Lisbon felt her curiosity spark. "You knew about this?!" She demanded, glaring at Jane. "Why didn't you tell me? What's going on?"

"Well, you see, while you were in the shower I snuck upstairs and talked to Pinkie Pie. I ordered some cupcakes and asked her to drop them off downstairs later. Then, I got you out of the room. We went for a walk, and she dropped them off while we were gone. Although I guess she ate mine . . . Happy birthday Lisbon!" Jane threw up his hooves and smiled expectantly, but Lisbon only continued to struggle with the situation.

"Birthday?"

Jane nodded and levitated the calendar from the drawer in front of her eyes, a large circle marked around the current date. Slowly, she began to realize that he was right. Wiping her eyes before they started to water, she laughed. She had forgotten her own birthday amidst the scramble of becoming a pony and dealing with her strange anxiety. But even with everything that had happened, Jane somehow managed to remember.

"Thank you Jane."

"No problem, but I think I should tell you that I spent the rest of our bits on this."

 ** _"WHAT DID YOU SAY?!"_**


	6. Chapter 6: Red Alert

**Red Alert**

Beads of sweat trickled across Celestia's white coat as she levitated another stack of documents to her eyes. She carefully, but quickly, scanned each one individually before casting them into the glowing pile of bent and creased papers behind her.

A deep cough echoed from the other side of the closed door. The guards were still there They were getting antsy by the sound of it. Biting her lip, the princess turned her attention back to the towering piles of papers around her.

The Royal Archives were filled with information about magic, history, and culture. But that wasn't the end of it. They provided Celestia and Luna with information on every citizen in every town. No matter how small said town may be. Yet, with all this information, the Princess couldn't find a trace of the ponies Twilight Sparkle had described in the recent letter.

Running an armored hoof through her matted mane, the alicorn shook her head wearily. _I shouldn't be getting involved! I already decided to leave this up to Twilight. I need to back off and give her this opportunity. But at the same time . . ._

Celestia let her hoof slip down from her mane. "At the same time, I must be able to protect my subjects from danger." Teeth grinding, she stamped the tiled floor. A loud _smack_ rang out through the chamber. "Why can't the answer be simple for once?!"

"Because my sister, if answers were simple, we would not need questions in the first place."

Celestia turned at the sound of Luna's voice and narrowed her eyes. "I told the guards not to let anyone in."

Luna chuckled behind her hoof and smiled as her bright eyes scanned the disastrous room. It looked like it had been hit with a hurricane. "And I told them to let me in. I'm a princess as well Celestia, or have you forgotten that?" A blue aura enveloped a pile of documents across from Celestia, and the princess of the sun watched as her sister took a seat beside her and began to read through the papers piled inside. "We are looking for the ponies Twilight Sparkle wrote about, correct?"

"How did you know about her letter?"

Discarding a sheet of paper, Luna smiled mischievously, her expression was identical to a hawk that had cornered its prey. "You tried hard to hide that letter from me didn't you Tia? But as you know, I don't give up so easily. While you were asleep I sent one of my night guards into your corridor. You can guess probably the rest."

Sighing, Celestia shook her head. The letters and pictures on each sheet of paper were all the same. A name, an address, and a town. Everything had started to blur together, and as a result, she threw the papers away hotly, causing Luna to flinch.

"I didn't want you involved Luna! You've already had to deal with enough!" Tears brimmed Celestia's eyes, her shoulders were lifeless and heavy. _If only I had payed attention. If only I had acted faster!_

"You can't take care of us forever sister!" Luna's starry mane rippled. The dark mare stood stiff and defiant, not ripping her strangling gaze away from Celestia for the slightest moment. "You can't possibly believe that everything is your responsibility. You already said that Twilight needs this opportunity! And now what, you're taking it away? Don't you trust her?"

"Of course!" Celestia shouted, voice cracking painfully.

"Then why do you wish to steal this chance for her to grow?!"

"Because . . ." Celestia straightened the crown on her head, unable to look Luna in the eye. "I don't trust myself."

The room went silent. The quiet was chokingly tense.

"Celestia, Twilight in a wonderful mare. Don't forget, she saved me from my own darkness once before. And, even after that, she saved Equestria from Discord. She and her friends even defeated a changeling army. You gave this mission to her, now you have to let her handle it."

"I guess I have to agree with you there."

"I understand the feeling of wanting to keep things to yourself, Tia." Luna said quietly. She folded up the document she had been studying, and set it aside; Only to pick up another. "But we- I'm, always willing to listen to you when you are troubled. One pony should not have to rule Equestria alone, as you did for one thousand years."

Celestia cracked a smile. Setting down her current folder, she leaned against her sister, blushing softly. "Thanks Lulu . . ."

Luna grinned widely and rubbed her hoof softly against her sister's curved back. A familiar warmth floated through her stomach, reminding her of the days when her relationship with Celestia hadn't been so tense and fractured because of their duties. It was a time before she had become Nightmare Moon, even before she had been overcome by jealousy and hatred.

"Let's say we finish a few more folders and take a break. Maybe we can play a game of hide and seek like we used to?"

"We will see Lulu."

* * *

"Hey, Lisbon?"

Holding back a frustrated groan, Lisbon curled herself deeper into her pillow and shut her eyes. Harsh sunlight seeped through the thin glass window and slept on her already hot cheek.

"Liiiiiissssbooooon?"

 _If I ignore him, he'll shut up._

"Lisbon, Lisbon, Lisbon!"

Her ear twitched.

"Teesa?"

Lisbon's eyes stayed closed, even as she heard Jane get up to leave, most likely to the bathroom. Over the last few days, they had fallen into a, more or less, precise routine. Jane would always get up first, and always stay in the bathroom for an incredible amount of time, leaving the edgy mare to rest her eyes just a few moments longer.

Once she was convinced Jane had left, Lisbon let her tense muscles ease into the large cushion she had wrapped lightly in her hooves. But she should have known better than to think she would get off that easy with her consultant always skulking around. A quick breath blew straight into her ear, hot and fast! Bolting straight upright, she threw off her covers and pelted the pillow across the room. Beside her bed, Jane was carrying a devious grin.

"Morning, Lisbon."

"Dammit Jane! Why can't you leave me alone?" Her tone was drenched with exhaustion, but it didn't deter the golden unicorn one bit. His smile stretched farther up his cheeks, and with a bit of magic, he passed Lisbon a brush for her wild mane.

"Out of all the things you could have said as your first word of the day, you had to go and choose one of your _colourful_ ones, didn't you?"

Wrenching the brush through a defiant knot, Lisbon shot him a dagger like glare. Every fiber of her being was screaming at her for being so irrational and, pardon the language, bitchy. Yet the thunderous debate within her head only powered the irritation itching at her skull. Stroke after furious stroke, Lisbon yanked the brush across her head, until it flew from her hoof. The brush soared across the room, heading towards the window.

It was funny. The first thing that fired through her was, _"I can't pay for the window repair!"_ Then, _"Ponies will come in and watch us sleep!"_ Luckily, Jane saved the day. He always did.

A bright light flared across the room, blinding the frazzled mare. When it subsided, Jane was sweating. Blue aura seeped from his horn, and the brush was levitating a centimeter from the glass window. He turned to her, his cheek clenched in his teeth. "Please let me help you. So we don't end up paying more than we already are."

Moments passed. Reluctantly, Lisbon swallowed her ever-so stubborn pride, and scooted towards the front edge of the bed to allow her consultant to sit.

The mattress wobbled as Jane climbed in and settled behind her with the brush. She tried not to stiffen as he delicately enveloped her mane in a soft glow. The brush ran over it thoughtfully. Once, twice, three times. Jane fell into a rhythm, and Lisbon eventually eased the strain on her shoulders.

"Are you going to tell me why you don't sleep?" Jane's voice was quiet, wary.

"I hear your voice in the silence." Twirling a hoof lazily in the air, she exaggerated. "' _Lisbon, buy me more three piece suits. I feel simply_ ** _lost_** _without them!_ '" She added extra emphasis on the word 'lost', drawing it out with a dramatic heave.

"It's true!" Jane huffed, trying to defend himself. "Everyone else thinks it's classy!"

Another bout of silence creeped out from under the bed, and Lisbon lost herself in the moment. Jane's strokes were much more soothing than her insistent rips. Calming and gentle. She thought about what he had said. The team certainly did pay attention to his suits, and had an opinion on them no doubt. But classy? That wasn't the right word.

"I miss them . . ."

Jane nodded, her words not affecting his rhythm in the slightest. "I do too." He said, a smily creeping up his cheek. "They were always there when I needed them."

"It's hard to think that they are really gone . . ." Shifting closer to Jane, she felt his stomach on her back. His hooves draped over her shoulders and locked around her neck gently.

"They were always so comfortable. Especially after a good wash."

Turning around quickly, Jane pulled the brush away with a confused grimace. "Did I do something wrong?"

 ** _"_** ** _What the hell do you 'mean they were comfortable'?! Were you sleeping with them?!"_**

Throwing his hooves in the air, Jane swallowed and admitted defeat. "No! I left them on my bedside table at night!"

"Wait . . . What are you talking about?"

"My suits."

Lisbon's green eyes narrowed. "Your suits?"

Jane nodded quickly.

Turning around with a chuckle, she sank back into him. Her soft laughter filled the room, returning the smile to his face. "I was talking about the team!" Lisbon said between laughs. "Not your suits!"

"How was I supposed to know?" His grip tightened on her as his body shook along with his chuckles. Not letting go of Lisbon, he levitated the brush back onto the table. He had snuck a small curl into her mane, something he had done with his daughter's hair sometimes. Now her wavy hair ended with a delicate twist.

Lisbon may not have answered his question, but that didn't matter at the moment. He would have another chance. And if he didn't ask her again now, it only left more time to analyze her actions and try to figure it out on his own. She was happy, and that was enough for him. It was hard for her to be away from the team. _Leaving them without so much as a word of warning must have been stressful for her . . ._

"I'm going to get us home, Lisbon. I promise you."

"I don't doubt that."

"Liar."

Lisbon continued to laugh as Jane pulled her closer than scientifically possible, giving her the sweetest hug she had received in a long time. Warmth washed over her, cleansing her entire body of the stress she had been lugging around since long before two nights ago. _Have we really fallen asleep twice since coming here?_

 ** _THUD THUD THUD_**

A sudden knocking on their door caught the partners off guard. In sync they slipped off the bed and cocked their heads at the door.

 ** _THUD THUD THUD THUD THUD_**

It wasn't their imagination. But why would anyone knock on their door? They lived in the basement of a candy store!

"Hey! It's Pinkie! I'm coming in, okay Teesa?"

The pink pony threw open the door before Lisbon could tell her to stop. In a flash, Pinkie Pie flew into the room and jumped around merrily, followed by the entire gang. Twilight was the second to enter, followed by Applejack and Rainbowdash. Rarity, and Fluttershy, brought up the rear, looking slightly uncomfortable.

"Hey there Sugarcube!" Applejack waved to Lisbon warmheartedly. "Nice to see yah again! How have you been?"

"Better than before. I'm feeling a lot more comfortable in Ponyville now. Jane and I went out for a walk last night. The nature around here is amazing!"

Applejack nodded in agreement. "Yeah. Ponyville is a small town, but it is much better than Manehattan or Canterlot!" Shifting her gaze, the farmer clicked her tongue. "Those places are nice and all, just not my kind of environment. You know what I mean?"

"We're excited to explore more of Ponyville." Jane joined in. A grin was plastered on his face. He was a con man. One of the best. If Lisbon hadn't known better, she would have bet all her money on that smile, and lost.

"That's why we want to invite you to come to the beach with us today!" Twilight chirped from the door. "What better way to show you how wonderful this place is? Everything is already packed and ready outside!"

 _The beach?_

"Now, hold on!" Lisbon barked, biting her lip. "Who said we wanted to go to the beach? You can't just barge in here and expect us to follow you!" Lashing her tail, she turned her back on the large group.

Rarity narrowed her eyes and let out an impatient _humph!_ Applejack shot a snarl in Rarity's direction, banishing her friend's sassy attitude. With the tension boiling, she wrapped a gentle hoof around Lisbon's neck. "Sorry if we startled yah Teresa. We didn't mean to drop in on you and force you to come with us. We only want to make you feel at home. Not knowing anypony is hard. Twilight here knows that. So she decided that we should take you two to the beach. I promise, you'll have fun! And I don't lie." Applejack winked playfully and stuck out her tongue. "Don't think I'm going to let you rot in this basement forever."

"Well . . ." Lisbon gulped. "Fine."

Applejack let loose a happy cheer and threw a hoof in the air. "That's great! It'll be so much fun! I promise! And if'n you feel uncomfortable, I'm right here."

Lisbon nodded nervously as Jane followed them out the door with a smile. She had finally had some stress relief . . . And now she was going to the beach.

* * *

Applejack stretched her back hooves out on the towel in front of her, letting loose a long and well earned yawn. Burning sunlight speckled the sand, and above their heads the clouds lazily trudged along the open skies. Lisbon pulled herself up off her back. Her own towel was borrowed from Pinkie Pie, who had claimed she would be too busy bouncing and swimming to use it.

"Well, is it as bad as you thought?"

Turning to the farm mare, Lisbon blushed. She had made such a scene about coming to the beach, yet it wasn't actually terrible. Sure, there were lots of foals running around screaming, but that only brought a wide smile to her heart. It was nice to see kids safe and happy. _That's what I work for._ "You know what Applejack, I'm having a nice time. Thanks for dragging me out of that room. Sorry I was such a pain."

Applejack waved a hoof and laughed off her apology. "Don't mention it Sugarcube." Squeezing a bottle of sunscreen, she slapped it on her tanned cheeks and rubbed it in. Tossing it to Lisbon, she pointed to the mare's gray coat. "You don't want to get a sunburn. I've seen gray mare's turn brown."

Franticly, Lisbon's hooves struggled to grasp the slippery bottle. It was labeled, "Celestia Block. For when our sun princess is too generous." With Applejack's warning in mind, she squirted the sunscreen all over her fur, only noticing how much she had taken when the bottle began farting instead of offering. "Oh, sorry Applejack!"

"Don't sweat it."

The two mares sat in peaceful tranquility as the sun warmed their stomachs. Lisbon listened to Jane and Twilight splashing in the not far water.

"Using magic to catch the ball is cheating!" Twilight shouted above Jane's teasing.

"Not if you use it too!"

"So, are you and that stallion a couple?"

Shooting up, Lisbon glared at Applejack, her cheeks roasting. "No! Not even close! I hate him! He's the most annoying, self absorbed lunatic I have ever met!"

"I guess it would be awkward going out with your boss."

Seething underneath her frazzled fur, Lisbon tried to ignore that Applejack had called Jane her boss. "It would be _very_ awkward." Laying back with a front hoof pillowing her head, she slurped her lemonade. The drink was still coated with small ice crystals from the chill of the cooler. _Applejack knows how to think ahead._

"If you don't mind me asking, I'm never sure what to call y'all. You call that prancing unicorn over there Jane, but he called himself Patrick Jane. Do you just prefer his last name? Does he prefer calling you Lisbon instead of Teresa? The whole thing boggles my brain a little more than I would like to admit."

"Don't think too much about it AJ." Lisbon said through the straw. "It's just natural for us because of our work. You can call me whatever you like, I don't mind either way." Shooting her a smile, Lisbon went back to her drink.

The lemonade slipped down her throat, fighting away the sweat that dripped from her head and mane.

"So, where did you get your hat Applejack?"

"From my parents." The orange mare replied, a hint of reminiscence entering her voice. Bringing the tattered leather down from her head, she pet it carefully and hugged it to her chest. "I've had it ever since I was a filly."

"I bet your parents are very nice. It seems like you care about them a lot." _They must be nice if she loves her hat that much_.

"They were nice. But they've been gone a long time . . ." Applejack sighed before slipping the hat back atop her blond head. Her bright eyes had softened and lost there usual gleam. Instead of smiling, she simply brushed off imaginary sand from her hoof. "It's hard to believe they died . . ."

 _Died?_

The prospect of death was not foreign. If anything, it was Lisbon's first language. Dead bodies and sad stories was nothing new to her. But to think that death could happen in Equestria? It just seemed unnatural and twisted. It sat like a blade in her stomach, cutting deep into her gut until it made her curl in agony.

"I . . . I lost my parents too. My mother died from a drunk driver, and my father . . ." Lisbon gulped. The memory wasn't pleasant. But sometimes, you have to rip off the bandaid and expose your scars. "My father committed suicide after he abused me and my brothers."

"You're kiddin!" Applejack turned towards Lisbon with so much shock that her mouth hung agape. Her eyes were as wide as saucers. Big, green, angry saucers. "There is no way that a pony could be that cruel! To hurt a family member? No, just . . . No!" Applejack threw an accusing hoof at Lisbon, the intensity of the movement stunning the mare in question. "You're ly'in! You've gotta be ly'in!"

"I wish I was Applejack. I really do . . . But I'm not." Lisbon's voice felt strained. Each syllable coming out of her mouth felt as painful as forcing an orange out of a grape. It burned, teared, and was agonizingly humiliating.

"Ah don't understand . . ."

"I'm sorry for throwing it on you like that . . . I just . . ." Taking in a breath, she composed herself. Why had she told Applejack? Was it because she felt sorry for her? No, that wasn't it. The reason was something worse, something selfish. "I felt like I should tell you because I believe everyone needs another they can relate to." Reaching out, Lisbon rested her hoof on Applejack's. The other mare drew back slightly, but Lisbon ignored it. "Do you want to talk about it?"

Staring blankly for a moment, Applejack composed herself. Her body was torn between breaking down into tears, and smiling as bright as the sun in Appleloosa. "I think I would, but . . . Maybe another time?" Tears sparkled deep within Applejack's eyes, and the freckled mare wiped them away before they could run down her warm cheeks. "Still, thank you very much for trusting me enough to tell me what you did. It means a lot Miss Teresa." Her southern accent shone through brighter than the rampaging sunlight that was scorching the beach.

Lisbon nodded and released Applejack's hoof from her gentle grip. She settled down on her blanket, and smiled. It was like a giant weight had been lifted from her chest. She could breathe again.

* * *

Pinkie Pie dived as the beach-ball headed for the sand. With a mighty _huff_ she threw her locked forelegs upwards and slammed them into its base. The plastic ball shot across the tall net and hit the sand on the other side.

"That's game!"

Applebloom's voice rang across the net to Sweetiebelle and Scootaloo. Scootaloo rolled her eyes and propped the beach-ball between her wings. Sweetie shrugged, still smiling.

"I demand a rematch! You have a grown up on your team Applebloom!"

Applebloom puffed out her chest. "That was the third game already Scoots! And Pinkie Pie technically shouldn't count as a grown up."

"Don't worry Scootaloo, we can play again another time. Alright? Besides, you did super duper fantastic!" Rubbing Scootaloo's head playfully, Pinkie Pie winked and bumped the beach-ball towards her bag. "And next time," she added in a quieter tone, "I'll be on your side."

Instantly smiling, Scootaloo raced off with the rest of the crusaders, leaving Pinkie alone to collect her bags. _It's about time I got moving. Twilight will want to get going soon._

Twilight . . . She had been acting weird lately. And so had lots of other ponies. Including Pinkie herself.

 _I don't want to . . . It's not my fault . . . Is it? Am I doing something wrong?_

The earth pony could feel her puffy pink mane deflating atop her head. But what could she do? The thoughts only kept coming, it felt like a train had crashed right through her body, knocking the breath from her lungs!

 _I don't want to make them pay to stay! But nopony has been coming to Sugarcube Corner lately! We need the money, or the business will be ruined! We'll have to sell the shop!_

Pinkie Pie rubbed her head throughly. A plan, she needed a plan. Maybe she could throw a party and get ponies to come to the bakery again. Or maybe she could put up a bunch of signs inviting them in for a free cupcake, or something like that?

"Why did everypony stop coming . . . Did I do something bad?"

The words were met with silence.

* * *

Lisbon plodded through the shallows, relishing the waves as they kissed her baking hooves. Fond memories of the beach flooded her mind, but none of them included her father. The brute hadn't even taught his own children the joys of swimming. And now, she was missing out.

Jane had understood her resistance and continued his violent game of Catch with Twilight. She wouldn't be surprised if he came home with a bloody nose.

 _Patrick, what would you do if you lost that friendship?_

 _"_ _I've come up with one final test for you Patrick. I'm going to break you. I'll snap you like a twig, and I won't even have to touch you."_

Shaking her head, she spread out a map in her mind. It was a map of questions she needed answered. Why had Red John sent them to _Equestria? He wants to break us up . . . Tear us apart. But how? Can he see us? Can he interact with this world? So far it doesn't seem likely. There hasn't been any real evidence . . . Has there?_

Still, something was prodding her mind. The answer, she was so close! "Why can't I figure this out?!"

She felt like her head was going to explode when the sound of splashing water sounded from behind her. Droplets littered her mane as Jane jumped to a stop in front of her. A quirky smile stretched up his cheeks.

"Lisbon? We are packing up the supplies. It's time to head home."

Lisbon gave Jane a quick nod and watched as he plundered out of the water to where the others had begun to gather the beach gear. Joining them, she wiggled a bag around her neck, it was overflowing with sand coated towels.

"Is everypony ready to head home?" Applejack called. The group nodded enthusiastically, Rainbowdash's sweat covered body already zipping overhead towards Ponyville. _I wonder what she was up to. I didn't see her once!_ At the back of the group, Fluttershy had a starfish in a small bucket. Every now and again, the yellow pegasus would shoot the creature a small smile, her face positively brimming with joy. Obviously, she had been somewhere not overrun by foals.

A small ways up the road, Rarity was sitting lazily on a sun chair, letting the rays sink into her white fur. Lifting her glasses and squinting her eyes against the sun, the mare spotted her friends walking towards her. Leaping off the chair and folding it up, she trotted to join them.

"Sorry I didn't join you girls on the beach. It's just . . . sand."

* * *

It was late when Applejack walked into Twilight's library. There wasn't any need to knock, her friend knew she would be coming. It was her plan after all. The lights were still on, and Twilight was hunched over a letter. She wore a scrunch of displeasure, or was it just deep concentration? Either way, it was quickly erased by the sound of the farm pony walking in with loud, impatient stomps.

"I did what you asked Twilight."

"Oh, Applejack." Twilight came out from behind her desk and gave her friend an apologetic curtsy. "Look, I know how hard it was for you. But you two seemed to really hit it off when you first met, so I thought it would be easiest if . . ."

"If I was the one that preened information out of her like a lying crow?" Applejack was steaming, her hooves shaking, her hooves restless.

Twilight flinched, the harsh words cutting deep. "Applejack, I'm sorry. I know how hard it was for you. But Equestria could be at stake!"

"She told me her parents died Twi! Her dad committed suicide!"

The words pierced the late night. Glaring at the slumping unicorn, Applejack dared her to speak. But the words that came out didn't make her feel any better about what she had done.

"Celestia is coming to Ponyville . . . She feels it is necessary to take extreme measures . . ."


	7. Chapter 7: Walking On Bloody Eggshells

**Walking On Bloody Eggshells**

For the fourth time since Lisbon and Jane were forced into Equestria, a new day dawned. Morning birds hummed outside and fluttered by the window as Ponyville prepared to the new day. Once again, Lisbon listened to the sound of running water coming from the bathroom.

Letting out a massive yawn, Lisbon stretched her hooves high above her head. The giant bags under her eyes only kept growing, and to her displeasure, they were becoming more and more noticeable. _It won't be long before Jane starts giving me hell about them . . ._

The stallion was the least of her worries at the moment though. Instead, she focused on the tight feeling strangling her stomach. Resting a hoof on the edgy fur, she sighed. _Why did I go and tell Applejack about my dad? Stupid! It's my burden, not hers!_

Looking back, it had felt like the right thing to do at the time. She had asked questions, and Applejack had answered them even though they were painful. It was only fair that she talked about something painful in return too, right? And what was better than her well-known abusive childhood? While it wasn't as bad as it could have been, it left scars that would never be wiped clean. Like a smudge on a screen, or a mark on a windshield.

The spraying water from the bathroom went quiet. After a minute of small shuffling noises and the short _hiss_ of a sink, Jane emerged from the pristine washroom, dripping wet and wiping the last of the sleep from his eyes.

"Morning." Lisbon said, her voice drawled out with fatigue.

"I'd say good morning to you too, but I don't think you really slept." His eyes narrowed with concern and he shut the door with a small spurt of blue magic, still trying to get in as much practice as he could. "Have you slept at all since coming here?"

"Of course I have."

 _Stop worrying about me so much!_

Jane shrugged, realizing that he wasn't getting anywhere anytime soon. Sighing, he dropped back down onto his makeshift bed and levitated their change purse so that it floated just under his nose. It was without a doubt, completely empty. "How much money did Pinkie say we had to pay her?" He asked worriedly.

"I think it was one thousand bits . . ."

The room was silent again.

"I don't think that's going to happen Lisbon. I suck with money. Add that to the fact that you can't stop breaking things."

"It was _one_ glass!" Lisbon puffed. With a surge of frustration she hurled a pillow at Jane, but he didn't even have to dodge it. The pillow burst into a shower of feathery guts as it collided with the large window behind him. A loud _crack_ was all the two needed to hear to know that they would be forever poor in this world.

"I guess we should get used to living in hermitage . . . Forever and ever . . ."

"Come on Lisbon, don't freak out. I'm sure . . . I'm sure we can fix this up. All we need is some glue . . . And maybe some duct-tape. Duct-tape fixes everything!"

"And how are we going to get duct-tape and glue? Do you have any money, because I'm pretty sure there isn't any in the pouch." She pointed blandly to the sad excuse for a money pouch resting beside Jane's feet. The thing might as well have been a graveyard for cash. Whenever they managed to scrape some up somehow, it disappeared miraculously.

"Well . . . I can think of one solution, but you won't like it." A sneaky smile spread across Jane's lips like a wild fire. It was dangerous, but insanely contagious. Before Lisbon knew it, she was smiling too.

"Try me."

"Alright, heres the plan. We sneak into the bakery upstairs, steal some pastries, sell them in the alley, and make loads of money. Then we can use that money to buy the glue and tape to fix the window before it's noticed. It'd be tricky, but if we managed to efface ourselves enough, we might be able to pull it off."

As Jane finished telling his epic fail-proof plan, Lisbon could only just keep her jaw from dropping to the floor. This man was crazy. Just plain crazy. _It's bad when I can't even tell if he's joking or not! I really need to get him to a specialist as soon as possible!_

 ** _THUD THUD THUD_**

The sudden ruckus outside jolted Lisbon from the bed, and she smacked hard onto the pink carpet as the sound of the banging returned for a second time.

 ** _THUD THUD THUD_**

Jane bit his lip as he listened to the knocking on their door. For some reason it sounded different this time. More patient, but also filled with confidence. Still, all Lisbon could hear was a painfully inducing door.

 _"Go away Pinkie Pie! It's too early for this!"_ Her voice was filled with an early morning rasp, leaving it much rougher than usual. But her plea seemed to work, as the sound stopped abruptly. "Thank you . . ."

 ** _KA-BLAM!_**

" _Fu-_ " Lisbon began to scream, Jane shot towards her and wrapped a hoof around her mouth. She felt her hooves leave the floor as Jane slipped his body over her protectively and flung them behind the bed as an object whisked by and burst into a shower of splinters as it hit the wall! The remains of their poor door lay steaming just across from where they were laying. Wood chips littered the room. The doorway, along with the stairs, were stained with burnt patches where the carpet had been singed by whatever had sent the door shooting across the room to its death. _Seriously, why does everything keep breaking?!_

The beating of Lisbon's heart was so fast she thought she would faint. Jane's trembling hooves were the only thing reminding her that what was happening was real instead of some crazy dream she was having after a little too much warm milk. _Not that sleep wouldn't be nice . . . Just a thought._

A nudging elbow tugged Lisbon from her wishful thinking, and she turned her head to see Jane gently dragging a hoof against his lips. Nodding, Lisbon mimicked him. Stay quiet, don't say a word. It was probably the only time she would _really_ agree with him on something.

Heavy footsteps thumped against the carpet as a mysterious identity welcomed itself into their little _bivouac_ , at least it was starting to feel like one now that they had no door and no window.

As the approaching, what they hoped was at least only a pony, drew closer, Jane removed his hooves from Lisbon and applied a small bit of pressure on her spine. She complied and ducked lower to the floor until she was completely concealed by the bed. Her heart continued to hammer in her chest, so fast that she was worried it would pop right out and slide across the floor, giving them away.

The footsteps halted in the middle of the room. Time dragged on for what felt like an eternity. Nothing except those armored white hooves mattered at that point. _Breathe in, and out. Inhale, exhale. You can get through this. It's just a horse. A smelly, stupid, ugly horse!_

"Patrick Jane, and Teresa Lisbon I presume?"

A golden glow enveloped the bed that the couple had ducked under and lifted it up off the ground. With a _squee_ Lisbon looked up to see who she presumed would be their destroyer. Relief washed over her as she saw that the one that stood before them was a regal, snow-white alicorn. Though she was decked with golden armor and a crown, she gave off a motherly aura that somehow drenched the scorching fear the duo had found themselves victim to.

"My name is Princess Celestia. I've come with some questions for you two. I deeply apologize for the accident with your door. My guards got slightly carried away." She pursed her lips and looked back at the two stallions standing awkwardly at the door with disapproval. "I will pay for all the damages done."

"Don't forget the window." Jane stated innocently, motioning to the shattered glass scattered about just behind the smoking mess that was their door. "Can't forget the window."

"Of course." Celestia smiled mischievously and waited for Jane and Lisbon to crawl out from under the levitating bed before she let it sink back to the ground. The legs of the bed had only just touched the carpet when the princess cleared her throat and proceeded with her intentions. "I hear that you come from . . . Where was it?"

"Canterlot," Jane sounded like he was answering the simplest question in the world instead of answering a super tall and magical alicorn princess. Lisbon couldn't decide if this counted as having a way with the ladies or not. She was tempted to go with the later.

"Why did you decide to move to Ponyville? If I may be so brave to say so, I don't think that it's because you liked this living space better." The princess's eyes roamed the small quarters. The blackened pink carpet, blown up door, and shattered window probably didn't make the cramped place more appealing.

Lisbon tugged at her necklace guiltily, eyes darting here and there, trying to find anything to focus on except for the goddess in front of her. Jane had always told her that she was a terrible liar, the worst. Celestia would know in a moment that something was off if she questioned her. Folding her ears back and doing her best not to seem too shaken, she left the talking to her crafty consultant. _But why is a princess here? What business does she have with two ponies living in the basement of a bakery? Unless . . . She already knows about us!_

"I'm a traveling magician, m'am. Lisbon here is my assistant. We wanted to try and preform somewhere we hadn't yet, so we came to Ponyville after hearing about how nice of a town it is."

Celestia raised her head slightly. "You're . . . a magician?"

"Yes, Princess."

"And you're from Canterlot?" the tone of her voice dropped greatly. It felt as though a sudden blizzard had surged in through the window, chilling even the stone-faced guards that stood fidgeting behind their goddess.

Jane flinched slightly at the change in tone. Not backing away, he narrowed his eyes and looked right into her own pink irises. "Yes, we are from Canterlot."

"Then tell me." Princess Celestia said as she began to pace around them, her armor clatteringl.

 ** _Clack-ching-clack!_**

"Why is it that after nights of looking through every profile for the citizens of both Canterlot _and_ Ponyville, I was unable to find profiles for either of you?" She fixed Lisbon with a fierce gaze. "Would you care to explain?"

Dread crashed down on Lisbon like a wave, drowning her in its overwhelming intensity. The large alicorn stared down at her, waiting for her to just _try_ to lie again. Trembling slightly, Lisbon attempted to make herself appear a bit taller, maybe if she masked her fear they could get out of the situation unharmed. "I'm sorry Princess Celestia, I don't know."

"You don't know?"

"I don't know . . ." Lisbon said, her voice failing.

"I see. That's too bad . . ." Celestia ruffled her large wings and shook her head disappointedly. Her eyes closed for a moment and Lisbon thought she caught a slight grimace flash across her face. Before she could be sure, Celestia gathered herself and motioned to her guards. "Please place these two under arrest. We have no idea where they came from, and they refuse to speak. Therefor, they could be a danger to Equestria, and all of my little ponies."

The guards saluted their queen respectfully. Following their orders without hesitation they advanced on the new targets, fierce determination glinting in their gazes.

A flickering tranquility swept through Lisbon's roaring heart when Jane wrapped his front hooves around her. They offered a sense of security strong enough to chase off the sudden tendrils of fear. Her rapidly beating heart slowed to a steady pulse as she recovered her composure and regarded the situation.

 _I am Teresa Lisbon. I'm a special agent for the California Bureau of Investigation . . ._

The two unicorn guards neared the foreigners. Their horns were ablaze and metal restraints levitated above them at ready. Jane's hooves only fastened around her tighter than before as the soldiers neared, giving Lisbon more strength and flooding her entirety with a blazing tenacity that would startle even the most gallant foe. Forget about the lies! She would do this _her_ way!

"Please, wait!"

The guards halted at her plea.

"We didn't come here to cause trouble, honest!"

Celestia's ears perked at this statement. She cooly put her guards at ease and seated herself on the floor before them. "I'm listening." she said, inviting Lisbon to continue."

"We were forced into this world while we were trying to arrest a very dangerous man." Lisbon explained. She carefully reminded herself to hold back on saying that, said man, was a serial killer. "We were sucked into some sort of mirror during the confrontation and somehow ended up in the middle of Ponyville." _It still feels like a dream . . ._

Tension clogged the air as each party struggled to process the information that was served. Even though Lisbon had lived the moment, she still couldn't really believe it had actually happened. Celestia on the other hoof was more curious about a small, and very exact, detail from what Lisbon had stated.

"Did you say, arrest?" she raised one hoof for a moment to think and rubbed her temple with the other. "You just said that you were trying to _arrest_ a man?"

"Funny story . . ." Lisbon chewed her cheek nervously as the mighty deity's eyes bore down on her with a staving curiosity that made her stomach flip. "We are actually cops back in our world."

Celestia's posture eased visibly at this, much to Lisbon's surprise. The agent thought that her confession would only add to the ruler's skepticism. "So you are like peacekeepers then? You protect others and even put yourselves at risk in doing so?"

"You could say that." Lisbon smiled and turned to Jane to let him know that he didn't need to hold her so tightly anymore. But instead of seeing a macho unicorn defending his friend, she was greeted by a sad excuse for a stallion. Jane was shivering in his own coat of fur, latching onto Lisbon for dear life as if she could save him from the terrible foe in front of them. His teeth chattered audibly in her ears like a broken clock. _Chick-Chick, Chick-Chick!_

 ** _"Jane?! You are a complete idiot!"_**

"I promise I'm protecting you, Lisbon!" Jane cried as Lisbon struggled to push him off with her back hooves. "But in order to do so I need to be alive!"

"You're such a pussy!" With a final heave she managed to dislodge the clingy consultant. "Seriously, this is ridiculous."

 ** _"They shot freaking lasers at us and blew up our door!"_** Jane shouted back, dumbfounded by his partners lack of concern and throwing his hooves in the air to emphasize his point.

"Celestia already explained that it was a mistake." Lisbon waved his concerns aside and turned back to the princess, who was staring at them with amusement that made the spunky mare blush. "Errr, anyways . . ." She cleared her throat. "I'm going to assume that you have a bit more that you want to ask us?"

"Oh, yes!" Celestia flipped through the conversation in her mind until she found the bookmark that showed where they had left off before Jane's little show had distracted them. "Let's get back on track, hmm?" As Jane and Lisbon nodded in agreement, Celestia resumed the previous conversation. "So, where are you two from? What world?"

"We're from a planet called Earth." Lisbon grinned as Jane held up his front hooves and mock-begged for mercy as if to say, _"We come in peace."_

"Earth? And I gather that you weren't ponies there."

"H-How did you know that?!" A shudder crawled down Lisbon's spine as Celestia chuckled. Her laughs were similar to a chirring bird.

"My first clue was the fact that you both lack cutiemarks, despite being grown ponies. The second was that you said that you were arresting a dangerous _man._ " Celestia's smirk stretched across her face as she concluded, "Dare I guess that you two were formally humans?"

"What the hell?!" Lisbon's words flew out before she could even consider what she was saying. "I mean . . . " she twirled her hooves hastily as she tried to forget that she just cursed in front of a goddess. "How do you know about humans? Do you have humans here?"

"No, we don't have humans in Equestria." Celestia replied. "The reason I'm educated about their existence is because I myself have studied different worlds." She frowned for a moment. "That was a long time ago, but I haven't forgotten the knowledge I gained."

"I'm guessing that something happened during your studies that made you quit." Jane said now that he had managed to repose himself. "What could have possibly made you opposed to studying other worlds?" A hard elbow to the side made him wince! He quickly shot Lisbon a disapproving pout. "I'm only asking a question."

"You shouldn't demand private information! She doesn't have to say anything." Lisbon growled, not meeting Jane's puppy-dog eyes.

"I stopped because I wasn't ready for the responsibility and I misused the opportunity." Lisbon and Jane stopped bickering, silently returning their attention to Celestia. Her words were dripping with choking regret. "I ended up betraying a friend. When he found out he stopped letting me continue my studies." a long breath followed. "Its been hundreds of years since that happened."

"I'm . . . I'm sorry." Lisbon shifted uncomfortably, unsure of what to say or do.

"Don't be. I've moved on." Celestia raised her head confidently, her mane swimming gloriously around her as though it was a veil. "Years after my friend passed, I started studying again. I was more careful this time. It was then that I discovered the humans and their world."

"If you've studied the human world, than do you have any idea how we could return home?" Jane cut in urgently, his words shone with a bright hope that caused Lisbon to smile! _Home!_

"It would be difficult. I can't promise you anything . . ." Wincing at Jane's defeat, the alicorn got to her hooves and offered her new friends a regretful smile. "I promise you I will do all I can to get you home. If I'm able to pinpoint your world I will send a letter to Twilight Sparkle. She will keep you informed of our progress. I thank you for your time today."

Lisbon bowed awkwardly and Jane followed her example, horn touching the carpet. As the princess turned to leave, she said over her shoulder, "Please don't make me regret letting you roam free in Ponyville. These ponies are my family, and should you cause them trouble, the blame is on my shoulders." the sound of her hooves died away as she trotted up the stairs, leaving Lisbon and Jane alone in their wrecked abode.

"So . . . That just happened . . ."

Lisbon could only nod. Her nerves were running haywire! If they messed up Celestia would hear about it and they would be thrown in jail for sure! _We can't mess up! We can't! I need to get back to California! My job! My team!_

Her reeling thoughts screeched to a stop! _My job! Oh God my job! I'll be lucky if I'm not fired by now! I haven't shown up for days!_ She shivered involuntarily and grit her teeth. _Maybe they will go easy on me! I've always been good, right? Oh, screw that! I've been a terrible agent since Jane showed up!_

"Hey, Lisbon?"

Lisbon flinched as Jane's voice shattered the doubting thoughts biting at her skin. Looking over to him she struggled to hide her rampant fears. Still, the stallion frowned at her. His blue eyes penetrated every wall she had constructed, they could see everything down to the smallest hair out of place. No matter how hard one tried to conceal their emotions, he would _always_ have them figured out.

Placing a hoof on her shoulder, he smiled and motioned to the shattered window. "I think the lack of sleep is finally getting to you." Jane joked, winking excitedly. "How about a walk? It's better than sitting here doing nothing right?"

The beckoning sunlight pouring in from where their window had been warmed Lisbon's back. It sending prickles of pleasure down her spine. Sweet scents drifted in from the streets and she tried to imagine what flowers produced the beautiful fragrances. "Sounds like a lovely plan." She said, her hooves suddenly itching to move.

"Awesome." Jane snickered, his horn lit up and he held a small mirror up to Lisbon's face. "But before we go anywhere, you should probably brush your mane. You've got some serious bed-head going on!"

 ** _"WHAT?!"_**

* * *

"I can't believe I looked like _that_ in front of a princess!" Lisbon snorted as Jane led her away from the sweet smelling bakery. Still flattening her mane feverishly, she bit her lip and tried not to whine. "It just isn't possible!"

"I think you looked positively delightful." Jane chortled and beamed, his smile brighter than a thousand suns. Lisbon rolled her eyes at him and closed the short distance that separated them, abandoning the desire to tidy up her mane.

The sun was at its peak and had beckoned all of the ponies out into its warmth. Lovely scents swayed through the air. Lisbon sniffed and licked her lips as she thought of all the restaurants available in the quaint town, then she remembered their financial situation and threw away her excitement like a bag of scraps. This walk was only making it harder to forget about the issues they had yet to face!

"So . . . Where are we going, Jane?"

"For a walk." Jane stuck out his tongue and shot her a cocky grin, his eyes glinting. "Catch me if you can snooty pants!"

"Excu-"

Before Lisbon could so much as get a word out, Jane was off like a bullet! His hooves clacked swiftly against the stones as he raced down the populated streets, swerving this way and that to avoid charging into anyone. Sputtering, Lisbon hastily tore her way after him, narrowly avoiding colliding with a cabbage merchant. Relief flooded through her locked up muscles as she soared across the ground. Catching a glimpse of yellow just paces away, Lisbon accelerated. With drumming hooves she broke through the crowd and skidded to a stop in front of a large tree in the middle of the street. Jane was sprawled out on the ground, his eyes disoriented and swimming. On top of him, Twilight was moaning and rubbing her head. Papers and books were scattered and strewn across the grass around them.

"Jane, what happened?!" Trotting over and offering a hoof, Lisbon helped Twilight to her hooves "I apologize for Jane's behavior Twilight, please don't mind him!"

"It's fine, really." Twilight shook her head one last time and offered Lisbon a shrug. "I was actually looking for you two anyways, so it was a lucky break."

"Oh . . . You were looking for us?" Suddenly weary, Lisbon frowned. "What for?" _I wonder if she knows Celestia was in our room this morning . . ._

A bright spark of purple flashed before Lisbon's eyes as Twilight levitated a flyer towards her. The paper was relatively simple with a crude drawing of two little foals decorating the bottom half. "Well, seeing as you two are short on bits, I thought this may be of help to you. The Cakes are in need of babysitters tomorrow afternoon. You'll be paid a hundred bits each!"

Snatching the paper excitedly, mostly because of the newly revived hope for good food, Lisbon smiled and scanned the text. It was true! "Oh wow! Twilight thank you!"

Twilight nodded and turned back to escape into her library, stepping over Jane on her way. "Good luck with the kids tomorrow. If you need any help just knock on my door!" And with that, the wooden door shut with a deep _thud_.

"Well look at that, your mischief actually brought us some good fortune for once." Lisbon did her best to stop her already goofy smile from growing as she looked over flyer. "Taking care of two ponies for an afternoon should be a cinch! And we get two hundred bits for it!"

"Guess we finally got our lucky break, huh?" Jane's horn lit up and he plucked the paper from Lisbon's hoof, saving it from being suffocated by her excited grip. "Let's put this somewhere safe before we lose it or something . . ." twisting his head this way and that, Jane frowned and tapped the paper on his cheek. "Just . . . let me think . . ."

"Why don't we just ask Twilight if we can borrow a saddlebag?" Lisbon offered, cheeks burning slightly at the thought. "I'm sure everyone must have at least a few."

Sighing, Jane knocked on the door, a pit of guilt in his stomach. As the purple alicorn reappeared he requested the bag. Twilight, luckily, smiled and slipped away for a moment before returning with a richly coloured saddlebag. Thoughtfully sticking out her tongue, the princess wrapped the straps tightly around Jane's stomach and clipped the iron clasps in place.

"You should be good to go now. Why don't you keep the bag?"

"We couldn't possibly pay for anything else right now!" Rubbing her hoof furiously, Lisbon shook her head. "Really, borrowing it for a bit is good enough."

"Pay?" Twilight chewed on her cheek and tilted her head to the side as if confused at the idea. "You don't have to pay me, I'm offering it as a gift." She shook her head as Jane and Lisbon stared at her in shock. Heart sinking, she looked at them both with what looked like sympathy or even pity. "You two . . . You really aren't from around here . . ."

"Why does everybody suddenly know?!" Jane flailed his hooves and groaned frustratedly! "It's impossible to keep track of this town!"

"I . . . I just had my suspicions . . ."

Stepping forward with a sudden spark, Lisbon looked the librarian in the eyes. "And did you by any chance share your suspicions with a fellow princess?" A smile slid onto her face as Twilight chuckled nervously. "I take it that's why there was a giant alicorn blasting through our door today?"

"Technically," Jane cut in smugly, "It wasn't actually Celestia that blasted down our door. It was one of her guards."

"Well, technically," Lisbon retorted, backing off of Twilight and facing her consultant, "Our door burst into flames, our bed was heaved into the air, our carpet was turned into actual heartburn, and our window was shattered into a million pieces."

"The window was all you." Jane poked her with his hoof and winked. "But if it makes you feel any better, you looked pretty sweet when you flung that pillow at me."

"I'm glad you liked it, because I'll be throwing a lot more than just pillows at your face if you keep this up."

"Umm . . ." Twilight waved a hoof awkwardly, attempting to catch the attention of the bickering duo. "Does this mean that you two aren't mad at me?"

"I wouldn't say mad . . ." Jane stroked his mane, ignoring Lisbon's threat completely. "But we would like to know how you figured us out."

Suddenly ecstatic, Twilight threw her hooves into the air with a wild smile and a full-toothed grin! "Well, at first when you said that you were from Canterlot, I was suspicious because of your lack of knowledge on our currency, since both Canterlot and Ponyville use bits. Then there was the fact that you didn't know anything about magic, yet claimed to be a magician of sorts. So, I invited you to work at my library so that I could get Spike to . . ." Twilight trailed off and twirled her mane with her hoof sheepishly, blushing slightly. "Please don't hate me, but I kind of got Spike to spy on you two while you organized the books so that I could learn more about you."

"Spike? Who's Spike!?" peeking into the library, over Twilight's shoulder, Jane scratched his chin. "I don't see anymore ponies in there." Before Jane could continue, he was cut off by a small giggle from Twilight, which made his cheeks shine red. "Wh-what did I say?"

"Spike isn't a pony silly! Spike is a dragon!"

 ** _"A DRAGON!?"_**

"A baby dragon." Twilight shrugged as if that was a reasonable reassurance. "But that's how I know, for certain now, that you aren't from here." sharing a long look with the both of them, she concluded, "I don't expect you two to tell me where it is specifically that you came from, but know that I'll do what I can to help Celestia get you both home." With a final smile and a short farewell she left them to ponder over her words. Lisbon was touched by the kindness the unicorn had offered, but Jane seemed to still be struggling with the fact that they had been spied on by a dragon.

"So . . ." Lisbon said after smacking her lips to get the distracted stallion's attention. "What now? I presume you had at least a hint of a plan before we left our recked abode."

"Nope, no plan at all. I already told you, I just thought it would be nice to get some air." He turned his head towards the clear sky and watched the clouds as they lazily floated along on their path. The town was as calm as the quiet of the ocean. Still, Jane sensed that underneath it all, there was something deeply wrong. His tail twitched, agreeing with him at the thought. Sensing that Lisbon was becoming impatient with his slow response, he finished hurriedly. "How about we head back to the river walkway again?"

"Sure, let's just be careful not to trip on any rocks this time." Lisbon remarked, checking the ground subconsciously in case any devilish rocks decided to mock her. "I don't want you jumping into the stream this time, especially because of my klutziness."

"You aren't a klutz. In fact, you're usually extremely aware of everything around you . . ." _And that's why that incident has been bugging me so much._

"Then I better make sure to bring that part of me along this time, hmm" she flicked her tail hotly. The warmth in her dazzling, emerald eyes washed away the lurking anxieties that had been dwelling impatiently in Jane's mind, and her carefree smile silenced the alarms that had started to resonate within him.

"Right." Jane agreed quickly, rushing out the word to disguise his frenzied head. "And if you _do_ fall in, I'll be there to catch you."

 _I'll always be here to catch you . . ._

 _"I've come up with one final test for you Patrick. I'm going to break you. I'll snap you like a twig, and I won't even have to touch you."_

* * *

"Please help me . . ."

Not fifteen minutes had passed since Lisbon and Jane had departed and set out towards the stream before a small whimper interrupted their jaunty parade. The source had been a small and pale filly, barely standing up to Lisbon's chest. Had it not been for the petite pony's harsh red mane, Lisbon might have missed her altogether.

"Find my doll . . ."

A shiver quaked Lisbon's spine as the chilling detached plea reached her ear. Without turning her head, she knew that Jane had felt the same ghostly sensation at the child's cry. Biting her lip and swallowing the lump in her throat, Lisbon shook off the bone-rattling vibe and bent down to the height of the seemingly remiss child's height. Aside from the slight depression from the loss of her doll her almost white eyes were dim and sluggish. "Where did you lose your doll?" Lisbon said as she attempted to console the distraught kid. "And where are your parents? They should be with you, shouldn't they?"

"Please fine my doll. The forest, it's in the forest."

Lisbon reached out to touch the stranger, but upon contact she yelped and jerked away. Raw tingling pains infested her hoof. Shaking it wildly like a storm of roaches had claimed her, she cried out and rubbed her frozen hoof perilously, shaking. Stones rattled behind her as Jane dashed over to where she was writhing on the ground, locking her frigid hoof against her stomach to try to warm it.

"My doll . . . Please find it for me . . ."

Lisbon scoured the area with her eyes hastily, but the filly had vanished. The place where she had once been was barren. Ponies continued to trot by, either undaunted by the scene that had transpired, or unaware of it ever occurring. It was like it had never happened at all. Jane was at her shoulder in an instant, his blue eyes dark with apprehension. "Are you alright, Lisbon?"

Lisbon blinked promptly and held up her hoof against the bright sunlight. There was nothing wrong with it! She scouted the area once more from where she had fallen, hoping to catch a glimpse of red or white flash among the crowd. Still, despite her effort, the attempt was fruitless. _It really does feel like it never happened . . ._

"I suppose I am." with a determined, _harumph_ , she jumped to her hooves and dusted the dirt from her warm gray coat. "But I think we should find that doll . . ."

"You really want to go out and look for the kid's doll?" Grimacing, he curled his lip instinctively and stuck out his tongue. "She was super creepy. We don't know anything about this place. What if she was some sort of demonmonstercrazypsychopathickillingmachine?"

"Then I'll handle it. It's not like I don't deal with one everyday already." Lisbon attempted to solicit a fake smile while she slid her delicate and unstable right hoof behind her left, hoping that the term, _"out of sight of of mind"_ , would apply. Jane mercilessly called her bluff.

"Can I see?" he started towards her, intent on examining her hoof again. Shooting a searing glare at Jane, Lisbon spun away from him and motioned determinedly towards the forest creeping the edge of the town, dark and threatening. Thick trees flooded the swampy outskirts, deeming it as an undesirable and treacherous.

"That's where we have to go."

"Maybe I'll just head back to our demolished home. Do you want some tea? I really want some tea!"

"Jane . . ." shaking her head, Lisbon sighed and trotted over to the panicked unicorn. Beating back her monstrous pride, she held up her right hoof for Jane to see. Ignoring the uncomfortable gut twisting feeling raging in her stomach, she ventured into a small speech. "I understand going into some crazy, dangerous situation isn't really your thing. But I know you are perfectly capable of going into a silly forest." she smiled as Jane looked up at her, interest emerging from his puckered lips. "You hate guns, action, and probably cops. Yet, despite that, you have been working with the CBI for years."

Jane was biting his lip now, something he had picked up from Lisbon in the time they had been in Equestria. Taking in a deep breath and exhaling, Lisbon raised her hoof higher and delicately rested it against Jane's chest so that he could take hold of it. As his hooves cautiously encased her own she felt a rush surge through her, leaving her full cheeks a bright crimson.

"Now, let me make this clear! Going into a dangerous forest isn't your thing, I get that, but it's important that you understand letting you fuss over my hoof like this isn't _my_ thing. This proves that you can go into those woods, even if you feel discouraged, got it?" She stole her hoof back and held herself proudly. That is, until a sickening sound exploded throughout the entire town.

"Bwahahahaha-ahahaha!"

"W-what? What's so funny?!" Lisbon stomped her hooves, sending settled dirt flying. The blush on her cheeks intensified as she struggled to come to a conclusion as to why Jane was flopping on the ground like he was dying. Maybe that was it? Maybe he was dying and this was just how he dealt with it!

"J-Jane, are you okay? What's wrong?" Slightly worried, and extremely angry, Lisbon dropped down to her knees and tried to catch the stallion's eyes. He was trying to say something, but it was utterly lost beneath his howling laughter. Leaning closer and resting her ear close to his mouth, she was able to catch his words.

"I . . . can't believe . . . I . . . got you to . . . do . . . that! Hehe . . . Ahahaha!"

The sound of a slap followed shortly after.

* * *

The Everfree Forest was a place where nopony dared to explore. Jane and Lisbon had learned this on their way there from the strange glances they were given. Though its branches reached high into the sky, in clear sight for the neighboring Ponyville, it seemed as though even looking in its direction was a sin. Lisbon had begun to doubt that a filly could even make it halfway to the Everyfree without being dragged back home by a citizen, but her greedy curiosity urged her towards the forest, and she wasn't about to turn back without even checking if the doll was there.

Knotted trees curled across the evening sky like a canopy, blocking out any trace of the dying sun. Moans and creeks occasionally disrupted the dreadful silence that lay heavy on the Everfree. The darkness was endless and left Jane and Lisbon treading slowly and clumsily. Sticks cracked, stones clattered, and mud sucked at their hooves. The only protection they were offered was the each other, and this did little to assure Lisbon. She trusted the eery red fog sweeping across the forest floor more than the trembling stallion at her tail. Still, she owed him for the angry bruise that she had stamped onto his cheek.

"Maybe we should just turn around and forget about the doll?" Jane's voice was almost inaudible against the chirping forest, but the slight trembling in it sent rolls of frustration down his boss' spine. The tension between them had built up like a sickness since they had entered the brambly wasteland, and it was rough going for both of them. The slightest twitch of an ear could set one of them off in an instant.

"And let that filly continue to wander around town aimlessly?" retorted Lisbon, snorting at the idea as if it disgusted her. Jane curled his lips back at her, the pink bruise only adding to his ferocious show. "As you said, we don't know if she is dangerous or not. We should just find the doll and hope she doesn't bother any other ponies."

"Oh, I'm sure you would _hate_ to bother anypony!" Jane snapped his teeth and kicked at the dirt as he followed her, the last of his jitters dispersing. "We should have just told Twilight about her . . ."

"No, then we would have looked _stupid_." firing the insult with a harsh bark, the mare turned on Jane and rose to her full height. She pressed her face against his. Though Jane would win in a competition of height, she had him beat when it came to outraged expressions. With twitching eyes and tight lips she seized Jane's chin with her hooves and yanked him closer, almost throwing him to the ground. Still, she wanted to be taller right now, and if that meant forcing him downwards, so be it. "I just want to get this dumb doll out of my mind, okay?!"

"Whatever," Jane muttered. He pulled away and rubbed his tender neck. The fog had thickened severely since their short argument. Seeing anything except the hoof in front of your face was impossible. "If we get lost it's your fault."

"I'd be a hero. Do you know how many people want you gone anyway?"

"I can think of a few. What about you? I'm pretty sure that's how your mom felt, otherwise she wouldn't have killed herself. And what about your dad? He actually tried to get _rid_ of you!" laughs filled the forest like a haunting drum line, different than before. They weren't filled with honest fun or joy, they were drenched in scorn and resentment. He was trying to hurt her. And it was working.

"It was an accident! She wasn't trying to die!" Lisbon screeched, her voice cracking. "You don't know anything about my life, so stay out of it! What right do you have to talk about my mother or father?! **_None!_** " she slammed her hoof against a nearby twig, shattering the wood into splinters!

"Everyone knows about your family issues Lisbon, there isn't anything you can do about it. You can try to run from it, but it won't work." This voice wasn't like anything that Lisbon had ever heard come from Jane's vocal cords. Even when talking to Red John himself, this scorn wouldn't even compare. "You can't escape your embarrassing failures."

A stray gust tore through the bristles fencing in the strangers. Crimson smog creeped around their hooves and swirled along the wavering breeze as it slipped across the dense outland. Lisbon took a step back, heart slamming down like a weight. She felt as though she'd been shot. Her chest was on fire, burning like a wild inferno. Breath hitching, she touched a hoof to her cheek. When it came back damp and stained, she realized she was crying. Emotions that she couldn't begin to describe churned in her gut, tearing at her insides, shrieking and begging to be released. "I . . ." Lisbon hiccuped and flicked the tears from her eyes, only for her vision to blur again immediately. **_"I swear to you, Patrick! I will bring Hell straight to your home! And when I do, you'll regret ever messing with me and my family!"_**

Jane smiled at that. Waltzing forward, he snatched Lisbon's cross and held it tightly in his hoof, the chain tight around her neck. "Fun fact, Teresa. I've already dealt with Hell coming to my house. I really don't have much left to lose." Jane yanked the cross from her neck, snapping the chain completely. Without taking his torturous eyes away from Lisbon's he chucked the charm into the busy thickets, where it was underneath the luscious plants and raging fog. The defeated mare pulled away desperately, scrabbling against the empowering stallions strength. Eventually Jane released her and she fell with a thud onto the wet grass. Water splashed up from the damp marsh and drenched her fur. A low wailing escaped from behind her clenched teeth, and as her disheveled mane fell onto her face with the burden of the rain, the sound reached out into the stars.

She had finally broken.


	8. Chapter 8: Bleeding Hearts

**(Please note that this chapter deals with sensitive themes.)**

 **Bleeding Hearts**

"Lisbon, I'm sorry . . ."

They had not found the doll that night. After hours of scouring the treacherous woods of the Everfree the pair had abandoned the quest. The stumbling walk home was made in complete silence, aside from the twinkling of Luna's stars and the late hustle of ponies galloping back to their homes. Neither Jane or Lisbon knew what could possibly be said to make amends for the terrible words they had said. Once the pair had arrived home they shut off the lights without a word and went to their separate beds. It was then that Jane had built up the courage to at least try to patch the lengthening gap between them.

"I don't know why I said those things! I'd never say those things to you, you know I wouldn't!"

The only sound that followed was the soft groan of the covers as Lisbon yanked them over her head. Her soaked cheeks left stains on the freshly cleaned mattress. Celestia had kept her promise. The white sheets were downy and brand new, the window and door had been replaced, and even the gaudy pink carpet was restored to its former tackiness.

"Teresa . . . please answer me . . ."

"Just . . . be quiet . . ."

Heavy silence fell heavily upon the room. Jane drew back at Lisbon's plea and defeatedly sunk into his makeshift bed. He could only watch her small form shiver underneath the thin linen sheets with every suppressed cry she choked down.

 _Please, Teresa . . . I wasn't the one who said those things . . ._

* * *

"You don't know how awesome it is that you two took on this job!" Pinkie's spontaneous voice boomed throughout the room her voice reverberating off the walls and sounding like a marching band. "I can't believe I didn't think of asking you two! Especially considering you have no money and live right downstairs." the bubbly mare laughed joyfully and scooped Jane and Lisbon into a bear hug. "I bet you two will be great with the Pumpkin and Pound Cake!"

Struggling to fill his crushed lungs with air, Jane smiled hesitantly at the pink mare squeezing them. "Yeah," he said, "It's kinda weird. So why do you need babysitters? Are you going out somewhere today?"

The innocent question triggered an unexpected response from the jolly pony, for she stopped dancing suddenly and released the breathless roommates. Guilt stricken eyes faced them when they regained their bearings, catching them off guard.

"Well, you see . . ." Pinkie Pie bit her cheek and rubbed the back of her head erratically, her mane losing its famous volume. "Sugarcube Corner has been hit with an unexpected financial issue . . . We haven't been having any customers lately, so we haven't been able to make any money." she shrugged her shoulders defeatedly. "You probably know what that means for us. We need a new way to attract customers, and fast. So the Cakes and I are going to a meeting today to talk to some ponies who might be willing to help us advertise."

Jane smiled in understanding, nodding his head acceptingly. "So you need us to watch the two young ones while you're out?"

"Exactly! And with you two watching them you'll earn a whopping two hundred bits! Not a bad profit for watching these two angels if you ask me." the party mare winked at them before throwing a saddlebag over her shoulder. "Do you still have all of the equipment I gave you?"

Prodding his own saddlebag with a gentle hoof he told Pinkie that he and Lisbon were good to go! The mare gave a quick salute and bounced out of the bakery in a flash, leaving a trail of confetti and the scent of fresh cotton candy lingering in her place.

"Well, are you ready to get started Lisbon?" Jane turned to see his partner, but she didn't meet his eyes. She had already started heading upstairs towards the distant noise of waking children. The sound of her hooves clacking against the wood was enough to tell Jane she wasn't in the mood to talk to him, or anyone for the matter.

 _I guess I can't blame her for that . . ._

Hastily trotting up the stairs, following the sound of Lisbon's restless hooves, Jane creeped down a stray hall and slipped into the room that swelled with the sound of gurgled cries. The door swung open with a quiet _creeeee_ , catching the attention of Lisbon and the two infants held in her clumsy hooves. She shot him a cold look as she tried to calm the wailing bundles, but her struggling hooves left the babies tipping and sliding. Sensing the uneasiness rolling off Pumpkin Cake and Pound Cake, Jane lunged forward and skillfully let the unicorn filly roll into his own hooves, guiding her into a warm and comforting embrace.

"You're good with kids . . ."

Jane almost jumped as Lisbon's voice hit his ears for the first time since the night before. He looked up thankfully, only to wince at the expression in her deadly green eyes. They were icy cold, filled with a whirlwind of doubts and regrets. Feeling himself being sucked into their depths, he shook his head and blinked rapidly to pull himself away. It was like running from your own grave.

Before he knew it, Lisbon was already leaving the room. Jane raced after her, setting Pumpkin Cake into the crib quickly. When he burst into the hallway he could see that his partner was already trudging down the steps with Pound Cake on her back. She glared back at him for a moment before mumbling, "I'm just fixing the kids a snack."

"I can help you, I'm good at making snacks for little kids!" he had only just started down the wooden stairs after her before she held a hoof to hold him off. "What?"

"I can do it myself . . ."

"Oh," he swallowed a whimper of dismay and painted a smile onto his face. "I understand. You want to be alone for a bit?"

Without so much as a nod, Lisbon disappeared behind the kitchen wall, abandoning her sullen partner on the creaky steps. A low whine sounded from the room where he had left Pumpkin Cake, beckoning him. Defeatedly, he made his way back to the lonely room.

Pumpkin was lying dejectedly in the crib, hooves flailing in all directions. Her screeches cutting through Jane's eardrums like bread-knives. Jane smiled at the precious child as he tenderly cradled her in his welcoming hooves. "It's okay, no need to cry." his voice was quiet and passionate, gentle as a fading moonlit night. "Lisbon is getting a snack ready for you and your brother right now."

At this, Pumpkin Cake sputtered a giggle and stuck her tongue out playfully. Jane shrugged and tickled her chubby stomach in reply, earning a few snorts and soon to be bruises from the youngster. "Hey, hey! No hitting!" he drew back and swiftly jolted his horn to life. The blue energy sparked and without an effort a small rubber ball floated into the babies grabbing hooves, settling her down immediately.

With Pumpkin Cake entertained for the time being and nothing left for him to do, Jane trotted back down into the kitchen, but he quickly doubled back to hide out of sight as he spotted an amusing show about to begin.

In the pristine kitchen, Lisbon was reaching to try and shove a box of crackers back into the high shelf. Though she was straining all of her muscles and lifting herself onto her tippytoes she was still too short to reach the shelf. With an annoyed grunt she swung herself up onto the countertop and used the lower shelves like a ladder to support her as she placed the box into its rightful place. Heaving, she leapt down with a dull _thud_ and went back to the amused Pound Cake, who had watched the entire thing from his highchair.

"Now listen you little booger, you'd better not tell Patrick about this." Though her tone was teasing, it still sounded heavy and melancholy. Pound Cake reached out and poked her nose inattentively. His playful nudge sent a small smile across the mare's face and she gingerly hoisted him from his seat, twirling around awkwardly with him above her head. Pound Cake squealed merrily and buzzed his wings as the air gushed over his small body, sending chills across his face. Lisbon broke out of the spin, dazed, and placed the goofy looking foal back into his chair. "Right, you and Pumpkin Cake must be starving at this point . . . I'll just finish up here and you'll be eating in no time." Lisbon turned begrudgingly to the devilish cupboards and groaned. "Hopefully . . ."

As Lisbon went back to battling the high cabinets, Jane sneaked back to where Pumpkin Cake was waiting, or at least where she was supposed to be waiting. When he walked into the quiet room he noticed the empty crib right away. Its barren mat taunting him. Fear began to bubble up in his chest and he flung himself from clothes pile to toy heaps, tearing them apart in hopes of finding the missing unicorn filly.

"Pumpkin Cake?!"

Sweat beads creeped down his forehead as he waved a hoof and tried to calm down. _Okay, Jane . . . Just breathe! Where could the little filly go?_ Worry clouded his judgment, sending him spiraling into a chaotic breakdown. _Where, where, where?!_

 ** _"_** ** _Patrick, why is Pumpkin Cake in the kitchen and not with you?!"_**

 _Crap . . ._

 ** _"_** ** _And why is she covered in milk?!"_**

 _Double crap . . ._

 ** _"_** ** _She ate the snack!"_**

 _And now I'm dead . . ._

* * *

"So, how did it go? Were the young'uns okay?"

Jane and Lisbon did their best to keep their composure. In truth, the job had gone fairly smoothly, until the incident with Pumpkin Cake eating the snake that Lisbon had been busily preparing. After a good chewing out, Jane managed to smooth things over and took it upon himself to prepare a new treat for the Pound Cake while Lisbon cleaned the bakery. Once Pound Cake finished his food Lisbon brought him and his sister upstairs, sang them a lullaby, and shut the door for the only a few squabbles the partners managed to come through, and looking at the hefty sum that Pinkie was dangling from her mane, it was worth it.

"The kids were great actually. There were barely any issues the entire time!" Jane grinned and tried to stop staring at their payment, still swinging in his face. "So . . ."

"I knew the kids would love you two!" Pinkie leaped up and down, bouncing from hoof to hoof. "And don't you worry, I haven't forgotten about the bits. Here you go!" She tossed the small sack to them, singing a catchy tune. "I guess I know who to suggest to the Cakes next time I'm absent!"

"That's only if we haven't made it home though . . ." Lisbon's reply was bitter, freezing the warm atmosphere that used to be present. With eyes as dark as a rabbit hole she stole the bag of bits from Jane and began to march out the door. "Thanks for the opportunity Pinkie Pie." The party mare's puffy mane drooped as Lisbon knocked the door shut with her back hoof.

"Sorry, Pinkie . . ." Jane said, gently nudging the distraught mare. "She's just had a rough time lately." _And it's my fault . . ._

"No worries. Let Teesa know I wish her better. Maybe I can throw her a party?"

"I don't think that's a good idea. She just needs a little time." he adjusted his saddlebag, "I'm going to head back downstairs and wait for Lisbon to come back. She probably needed some fresh air."

"I'll see you soon!" pinkie beamed, puffing out her cheeks to contain her excitement. "And when I do, Teesa will be the happiest ever!"

"I don't doubt that one bit." Opening the door, he threw his saddlebag in and followed it down the steps before collapsing on the bed that Lisbon had claimed. He was beat. _I'll have a short nap, she won't mind . . . Too bad it's not a couch . . . zzz . . ._

* * *

Moonlight speckled the room as Jane woke. He rubbed his heavy eyes and groaned, the stressed muscles in his back were finally relieved.

 _Feels good!_

Swinging upright, Jane scanned the dimming room in search of his boss. She hadn't returned. The makeshift bed at the side of the room was unkept, just as it was that morning. Perking up his ears in hopes of hearing the sound of running water, Jane hopped off the bed and silently tiptoed to the bathroom door. Dead silence came from the other side.

 _Where is she?_

Jane darted upstairs and raced out the bakery door before being blasted by a sheer, cold wind. The town was slumbering and, by the location of the moon, it was past midnight.

Panic flared in Jane's chest as he dashed through the familiar roads that blurred dizzily around him. His mane pulled at his head as the wind greedily grabbed at its blond strands. Stars glimmered above in the night sky, illuminating the streets just enough to give him an idea of where he was going.

"Lisbon?!" Jane called frantically. His voice was beginning to grow dry and raspy. "Lisbon, where are you?!"

His calls echoed in solitude. His pounding hooves sent stones clattering as he halted his advance. Harsh breaths choked his lungs, only giving him enough air to keep his head clear. His heart thumped against his ribs as if it were fighting a bloody war inside of his chest. _Lisbon . . . where are you?_

A sick feeling wormed around his stomach, leaving him slouching over in the streets. Lisbon had been acting out of sorts, and her behavior had only gotten worse throughout the day. He had tried to bind their crumbling relationship, but no matter what she only kept pulling away. Now she was alone somewhere in the dark streets. Though Jane wasn't worried about her getting hurt, he was worried about what she could do to herself if left alone in her current condition. She was stubborn, and most certainly independent, but she wasn't in her right mind. The Lisbon he knew would never leave her partner alone in a foreign place, or anyone for that matter! Regardless of how mad she was with them.

As Jane's heart continued to flutter in his shaking chest, the sound of hooves on stone caught his attention! With a burst of hope he scanned the streets and noticed the silhouette of a distant mare. Even from where he sat he could slightly make out the elegant swoop of the bangs he had grown to adore.

"Lisbon!"

With eyes blurred with fresh tears, Jane darted forward as fast as his tired hooves would take him. She was safe! Maybe she had just wanted some fresh air? Maybe she had just needed more time alone than he had originally thought?

The figure turned in surprise at the rapid approach of Jane's booming footsteps and lurched back in surprise. The precaution sent a wave of confusing over Jane's bones, but he was filled with too much relief to care. "Lisbon, it's me!"

"Excuse me, but can I help you?"

Jane's beating steps immediately went silent as the mare spoke. He blinked quickly as he wiped his eyes to free them of the drying tears. Now that he was only a few steps away from the mare he could easily tell that she was a stranger. And not only that, but a stranger carrying cello strapped to her back.

"Oh, I . . ." Jane's features fell dramatically and as he rubbed his head awkwardly he began to sense the dread he had previously endured returning to his stomach. "I thought you were someone else, that's all . . ."

The mare in front of him had a warm gray coat similar to Lisbon's, and she even had the same swooping forelock. Yet this mare's mane was a deep charcoal, and it was carefully groomed so that it curled and fell with the entirety of grace itself. She stared at him with brilliant purple eyes. Then, with a voice flooding with concern, she smiled and shrugged her slender shoulders. "I've been told that a few times today actually."

Jane's ears perked up and he swallowed patiently. His legs were itching to keep searching for his partner, but his gut told him to stay and listen to this strange mare who, for some odd reason, was accompanied with a lovely british accent. He owed it to her at least, for most likely startling her out of her own fur just seconds ago.

"Actually, now that I recall, Applejack herself came up to me in a rush earlier, looking for the same mare as you. You were calling out to a girl named 'Lisbon' just now, weren't you?"

"What's your name?" Jane asked, a little hesitant. He had never seen this mare in town before. Why does she look so much like Lisbon? Is it just coincidence?

"I'm Octavia, Octavia Philharmonica." Octavia replied, her eyes widening and her voice pitching with confusion. "I'm a cellist for the Canterlot Orchestra." She bit her cheek and tucked away the disappointment at not immediately being recognized, especially when she was even carrying her notable cello. "What might I call you?"

"My name is Patrick Jane, I'm . . . I live here in Ponyville." His voice stuttered slightly as he tried to think fast. With Lisbon's disappearance clogging his mind he was finding it difficult to concentrate on a structured lie.

Octavia narrowed her eyes and tapped her chin with a gentle hoof. "'I've never seen you here before. I come here with my friend often, she's a DJ for Pinkie Pie frequently."

"I just moved here recently myself. I guess I just wasn't here when you came last."

A sigh escaped Octavia's lips and she shouldered her slipping cello back into place, turning away slightly. "I'm not sure why you feel the need to lie to me," she muttered. "But I would like to help you find your friend, if you will accept my offer." She smiled slightly and her eyes glinted in the expanding moonlight.

 _This mare confuses me, but she at least seems like a trustworthy pony . . ._

"If you would be willing to help me, I would gladly accept the favor."

Octavia nodded her head to a nearby street. It was too dim to see the path clearly, but the sureness escaping the mare left little doubt that she knew exactly where the trail went. "I heard some sort of ruckus at the bar as I passed by it earlier. It might be a good place to check." she started forward, but Jane quickly reached out and grabbed her tail. Octavia flinched at Jane's tug. Realizing what he had done, he quickly released the thick charcoal strands and did a quick apologetic shake of his head. "Sorry! It's just that . . . Lisbon wouldn't go to a bar. I know she wouldn't! She hates that kind of stuff."

Octavia's eyes settled and she rested a hoof on the unicorn's tense shoulder. "I'm only telling what I heard, Patrick."

Jane's ears twitched slightly as she said his first name. It sounded strange to him now. He almost didn't recognize it. The only time anyone actually called him by his first name was when he got into some sort of trouble and caused havoc.

"We should at least check it out, shouldn't we?" as the affluent mare offered an encouraging smile, Jane nodded in defeat. With the moonlight guiding them they walked down the dark street and set their destination. They were headed to the bar.

The silence between them was louder than a screaming manticore. With a small glance towards his new companion, Jane easily noticed her roaming eyes and puckered lips. They definitely had awkward silences in Equestria.

"So . . ." Jane mumbled eventually. "What are you doing in Ponyville?"

Octavia perked up instantly, a smile gracing her face. "I came down for a performance actually!" she nodded towards her cello with a goofy grin that almost seemed unfitting for such a posh mare. "I've been playing my cello a lot lately, and I feel like I'm favouring the little guy." with a gentle a gentle hoof she caressed her instrument carefully and closed her eyes. Somehow, she managed to keep walking forward with an untroubled stride. "I wanted to purchase a double-bass for my performance, so I came here to purchase one."

Jane's mouth opened slightly with confusion. Checking the mare over quickly, he concluded that she wasn't lying. In fact, she was practically killing herself to not blurt out how excited she was about buying a new instrument! "Why would you come all the way to Ponyville to get a new double bass? Wouldn't it be less wok to get one in Canterlot? I'd imagine that they would have lots of music stores in a fancy city. And wouldn't they be higher quality?"

As Octavia started to chuckle softly, Jane could feel his cheeks flush red. What had he said wrong? he bit his lower lip to keep himself from challenging what could be his best bet at finding Lisbon. Octavia was able to quickly quiet the laughter that had taken over her just in time to regain her high class appearance as a young couple, a pegasus and unicorn, trotted passed them.

"I apologize for that unacceptable display." Octavia said firmly. "I guess I owe you an explanation, eh?"

"Yes, I believe you do." Jane replied, covering his own delight as the pony with a british accent blatantly pulled off a canadian stereotype.

"Alright, well . . . " Octavia paused and gathered her thoughts as the pair rounded a corner and walked down a new road. The mare adjusted her cello strap and gave a small, _"Ahah!"_ as she figured out what she wanted to say!

"I'm guessing you've either been to Canterlot, or at least a big city before, correct?" At Jane's nod, she continued. "Haven't you noticed that, though they may have a larger selection, they don't promise good quality?"

"I guess so . . . I don't know how many times I've purchased something from some sort of fancy city, only to have it break within a week!" _Although when you play with fire and explosives I can see why they get ruined so quickly . . ._

"That's why I didn't want to buy my double-bass in Canterlot. They don't really care all that much for quality. What they are after is purely bits, bits, and more bits!" she sighed as if disgusted by this fact, before looking back at Jane. "While I probably could have commissioned a talented pony to build a good instrument for me . . . I would rather find one myself. In fact," Octavia fiddled with her cello again before continuing. "I got this darling in Ponyville years ago with my mum and dad." a hint of sorrow crept into her voice, but she shoved it away and smiled toothily.

 _So I take it Octavia has trouble with her parents as well . . . That's scarily ironic._ Jane returned her grin and nudged the slipping cello comfortably back onto its rightful perch. "I guess the ponies here are more . . ." he searched for the rightful words in his head. "They are more concerned with quality and put more heart into what they produce."

"Precisely!" Octavia chimed! "So, as you can tell, I would take a train to get an instrument to love and cherish over walking to an expensive and money-hungry store any day! Why would I buy a half-flanked double bass form some greedy salespony?"

"That's makes sense to me." Jane agreed just as the sounds of rambunctious ponies drifted over to them from down the street. The bright flashing sign of the bar lit up the town more than the moon every could. Jane briefly wondered wondered how they hadn't noticed the small bar before. Octavia certainly knew of it though. He guessed it was probably because of her DJ friend.

"I still don't think she's in there." Jane said, a hint of doubt creeping into his voice. The bar was certainly very rowdy that night. He didn't disagree that it was more alive than usual. If it was, Lisbon and him would have heard it the last few nights.

"Shall I wait here?" Octavia asked quietly, sympathy sparked in her eyes as she looked towards the distressed stallion. "I don't mind. If she isn't in there I can try and help you search elsewhere."

Jane was about to thank the musician when a hauntingly familiar voice raided his ears from the direction of the ruckus.

 ** _"_** ** _Oh come on! I totally won that fair and square you a-"_**

The voice was drowned out again by fits of laughter, but Jane didn't have to hear anymore. He knew who it was.

 _Lisbon . . . why are you at a bar? You hate being around this kind of crowd!_

"It's fine, thanks for everything you did tonight." Jane smiled tenderly and waved a goodbye to his new acquaintance. "Good luck with finding a double bass!"

Octavia frowned. "Thanks, but I'm not getting one until tomorrow. Are you positive you don't need assistance? I can call you two a cab, bits on me."

Jane looked at her, mouth almost down to his chest. "How did you know it was Lisbon that I heard just now?"

"It's easy to tell when somepony hears the voice of one they love."

Jane could only watch as Octavia trotted over to a phone booth. He felt slightly guilty as she fumbled a little with the buttons while she dialed the number for his cab. She didn't have a horn to make it easy to hold a phone and dial at the same time. Instead, she balanced on her back hooves and leaned against the grubby glass as she pressed the buttons, using the wall to support the big, black phone.

Minutes later she carefully exited the booth and quickly skimmed across the edges of the bustling crows, making it back to Jane. Her coat was stained with dust and grit from the battle with the phone, but she looked happy nonetheless.

"Alright," Octavia grunted, slightly embarrassed by her less than proper display. "I called a cab for you and Lisbon. It should be here shortly. I'll stay and wait for it while you retrieve your friend. I'd try to go in with you, but I'd rather keep my cello in one piece."

"Don't worry, I understand. You can't leave it out here alone either." When Octavia nodded remorsefully, Jane nudged her with a grateful hoof and started to walk towards the disorienting paradise. Before he entered the feverish party, he turned back to Octavia and offered her a final wave. The last of her distraught left her face after that, and Jane disappeared into the smokey bar.

* * *

"Oh, yeah! Fill her right up!"

Lisbon's challenge sent cheers through the boisterous crowd. As she stole her now filled glass back and downed the mysterious addictive substance the applause thundered like a whirling storm!

Whipping a hoof across her mouth and smacking her lips se glanced at the two cards in her hooves. The images blurred as her eyes failed to focus on the colourful images decorating the paper, still, she figured she could pull of a win.

"All in!"

The stallions at her table watched curiously as the strange mare shoved all her chips into the pot. They muttered amongst themselves as they tried to understand what she was up to. One of the bulkier stallions, his coat coloured a deep red, shot Lisbon a glance of intrigue. "I can't say I've ever seen a poker player quite like yourself, missy. Most mares stick to betting two's and three's. I like how you work!" With a hungry grin he shoved his own chops in and met Lisbon's bet. "I accept your challenge lady!"

"You're gonna regret that!" Lisbon said smugly. She was on top of the world! She wasn't sure how he got into this predicament, other than the fuzzy memory of some head bobbing mare, but she didn't care. This was awesome!

The red stallion looked over to the last player, a slimmer unicorn. The unicorn pursed his lips and reviewed his own hand, then scanned the pot and the flipped cards. The pot would be huge if he pulled off a victory, but the new mare was appareled with the most sure smile in Equestria, it was like she had already won. Finally he set his cards down and folded.

"Alright! What do you have in your pretty little hooves, missy?"

Lisbon started to chuckle, then she completely lost it. Her laughs erupted so suddenly that the red stallion couldn't help but flinch before joining in the fun. Lisbon looked at her hooves again and did her best to read the small cards, she just couldn't see them! Snatching a beer from the table and emptying half the jug she heaved a sigh and laughed again. She had no idea who's beer she was even drinking, but as far as she was concerned they could just go rot in jail.

"I-I have n-no idea! Ha-haha-ha! Lisbon flung her two cards onto the table and her opponent looked at them with a confused expression.

"Missy, you just went all in with two Jokers!" He snickered and slid the cards aside. "Guess we outta remember to check th'deck first, eh?"

Lisbon sniffled and held the beer jug close. The glass made a pretty ding as it tapped against her teeth. The sound intrigued her, and she lost herself in the entertaining dinging.

 _Ding_

 _Ding-ding_

 _Ding-ding-ding_

The bar was live with jubilant banter, and for once in her life, Lisbon felt like nothing was her responsibility. She emptied the jug with a mighty belch and shoved it beside her heap of drained glasses.

"You're a riot, girl!" The red stallion smacked the table and looked Lisbon in the eyes. She tried to meet his gaze but her eyes kept wandering to the storm of colours streaming from the walls and the glinting wine glasses occupying deserted tables. "What's your name?"

Lisbon had to think for a moment before she could offer him an answer. At least, she was pretty sure it was an answer.

"Tresa Libon."

"Well Tresa, my name's Luke Stealer. I have to say you made this night one of the best!"

Lisbon smiled and was about to reply, but a sudden shout caught her attention. It also made her blood boil. She narrowed her eyes and pulled a fresh jug towards her.

"Lisbon!"

A golden unicorn pushed his way passed the last of the hyped crowd until his blue gaze rested on her. He smiled cautiously and started to walk over to her, but her glare made him halt.

"What do you want" She barked. Anger flew wild inside of her, yet she didn't know why. Suddenly, she felt enraged and scared. Sweat dripped down her face and she clasped her full jug so tightly it cracked, releasing small droplets of alcohol that crawled down to the table.

"Lisbon, let's go home. A nice mare is waiting outside with a cab. We shouldn't keep her stalling." His voice was careful, but relaxed. It didn't make her drop her guard though.

"Is this stallion bothering you, Tresa?" Luke muttered. He looked from her to the stallion. "Who are you?"

"My name is Patrick Jane. Lisbon is my partner. I need to get her home, but I think I might need a little help getting her to come back with me . . ." Luke regarded the unicorn for a long while, but in the end he sighed and rose from the table. "Alright, but you better not be ly'in to me."

Lisbon shot daggers at Jane with her green eyes as she sipped from her jug like it was all that was keeping her alive.

"Hey, Tresa. Why don't you take it easy there hmm?" Luke tentatively reached out and held the handle of the jug, still tight in Lisbon's hold. The delirious mare growled quietly and tightened her grip on the beverage. When Luke didn't let go, she released it defeatedly and turned her head away. "Good job. Now how about I escort you outside?"

Lisbon's eyes traveled between the two bigger stallions before she slithered off her seat and took a few wobbly steps on her own, barely noticing when Jane stepped beside her to support her trembling frame.

"Just follow me Tresa. We're gonna bring you home, okay?"

Lisbon moaned gibberish and followed the red blob ahead of her.

"Home?"

Luke glanced back at her and shrugged. He couldn't begin to understand the significance of what he had just said. "Yeah, home."

When the group managed to squeeze out of the bat they were welcomed by Octavia, who was beckoning them from beside an impatient cab.

"Thanks for the help, Luke." Jane said as he accompanied Lisbon to the cab. "I'm more grateful than I can express."

Luke winked to the duo and escaped back into the world of alcohol and disco lights. The last Jane heard from him was, "You might be thanking me now, but tonight won't be pretty for you two. I don't know how much that crazy mare drank, but she'll in for a headache! Good luck pal!"

Shaking his head, Jane lifted Lisbon into the carriage-like cab. After moments of awkward scrambling she flopped onto the padded cushion seat.

"I guess this is farewell?"

Octavia had strode up quietly behind Jane as he was forcing his partner into the vehicle. The musician scuffed the dirt road with her hoof as she waited for him to tell her what she knew he would say.

"I'm afraid so . . ." His eyes darted back to the cab where Lisbon was patting the drivers back playfully, leaning precariously off the edge of the cart. He groaned and gave Octavia a quick hug before backing towards the scene behind him. "I should probably go before the driver kicks her off."

Octavia nodded and wrapped him in another hug. "I'm glad everything worked out." She whispered, stepping back and swinging her cello onto her back. "Wherever you are really from, I'm guessing you'll be heading back soon . . ."

"If we are able to . . ." Jane leaped up onto the seat beside Lisbon and yanked her away from the driver before shooting Octavia a swift salute. "Thanks for the help officer!"

"No problem, good citizen!" The fancy mare returned his salute dramatically.

"I'll keep a lookout for some of your CD's. I forgot to mention, I'm a big fan of classical." Before Octavia could think of a response, he turned to the driver. "Sugarcube Corner, and try to get there fast!"

* * *

 ** _"_** ** _Blargghhh!"_**

Another hunk of the contents in Lisbon's stomach emptied into the toilet, leaving her tired, sick, and sprawled out on the floor. The porcelain toilet was her best friend, her pillow, and the only thing keeping her upright. Jane held her long mane away from her face and rubbed her back. _Should have seen this one coming . . ._

"You should go to sleep, Patrick . . . I'm fine . . ."

"If you're fine, I'm a car."

"You'd probably be a fast car."

"I'd be a car that sleeps on a couch at work and drinks tea eight times a day-"

 ** _"_** ** _Blaarrrrghhhhhh!"_**

"Nice one, I think I could hear the individual pieces that time."

"That was disgusting . . ."

The two friends quiet banter echoed against the bathroom walls. It had been forever since they had talked like this. Jane couldn't help the small giggles that escaped his mouth as he patted Lisbon's arched back. The bathroom would most likely be less serene when they were done with it.

The tile floor was growing cold, and with the night getting later, Jane was beginning to yawn. He had only just gotten into a good sleeping routine. After years of sleepless nights it had felt great to rest his tired mind during the dark hours, knowing Lisbon would be waiting for him at work the next morning. But as soon as he had started sleeping well, she had grown more restless. It was like an insomnia swap.

As another yawn broke the silence, Lisbon shoved him away and flushed the toilet. Unravelling the closest role of toilet paper and wiping her face harshly. "I'm good now, let's get some rest . . ."

"Are you sure?"

"Jane . . ."

Sighing, he got to his hooves and shook his head in defeat. "I get it, stop fussing. It's just . . . I feel like you're drifting farther away every second . . ."

 _Maybe I am drifting farther away . . ._ Lisbon shook the thought away and stepped out of the washroom. "You worry too much. I'm just tired."

"You know that I can tell when you're lying."

"I know . . ."

Jane groaned and collapsed on his bed of blankets and pillows. He was exhausted. The thought of sleep was certainly appealing. Once he was wrapped up in his sea of blankets sleep swept him away, away on smooth waves and open waters.

"Goodnight, Lisbon . . ."

"Goodnight, Jane."

* * *

"So, you failed again?"

Lisbon jolted awake, or at least she thought she did. Darkness surrounded her, blotting out the environment completely. The space underneath her was empty, she was floating in the pitch black depths.

"You even let your consultant, no, your _partner_ , down."

"Who are you?!" Lisbon cried out, her voice cracking. "Show yourself!"

A small silhouette flickered in the distance, and then a familiar figure revealed itself from the blackness. Her blank eyes just as dangerous as Lisbon remembered them being.

"You failed me . . . You didn't find my doll. And then you let Jane down . . ." The filly with the red mane gasped. "Your dad too? Didn't he commit suicide?"

"Shut up!"

"He did, didn't he?"

"I said, shut up!"

The cold filly chuckled and waved Lisbon's warning off. "Oh, you should watch your mouth. Ponies really hate it when a bully like you orders them around all the time. Luckily, unlike your daddy, I won't go and kill myself just because you piss me off."

Wincing, Lisbon stumbled backwards. "He didn't . . ." she said. "He didn't kill himself because of me . . ."

"Are you sure about that? You are awfully hard to deal with most of the time. Think about Jane. This whole time he's been doing everything to make you happy. Did you ever stop to think that he might be having a hard time too?"

"Of course I have!"

"Then why did you never do anything special for him?"

"I . . ."

"You what?"

"I don't know . . . I just . . . I never thought of it."

Shaking her head, the pale filly simply let out a sigh and shrugged. "Yeah, I know you didn't. You know why? Because you're simply a selfish girl. The world would be better without you. All you do is hurt people!"  
"No, that's not true!" Lisbon screamed back, trying not to let her emotions run rampant. The darkness around her swirled and she lost her balance. Shadows rushed around her as she fell, faster and faster into the never ending pit. Still, the filly in front of her stayed on her hooves.

"It is true. You just don't want to admit it. But, there is a solution. You can stop everyone's suffering. The only thing you need to do is disappear." a gun floated in front of Lisbon as the stranger finished her words. "You have the power to make everything stop. All you need to be willing to do is pull the trigger."

* * *

Lisbon shot out of bed, shuddering at the memory of the nightmare. Tears brimmed in her eyes and she did her best to rub them away. The gentle sound of Jane's snoring let her know that she hadn't woken him with her sudden outburst. That was good. She felt something cold in her hoof, she looked down to see she was still holding the gun from her dream. _Yeah . . . a dream . . ._

The suffocating feelings riling up in her gut hadn't left her. They were still alive inside, burning all the desire she once felt to get home. Staring at the gun she began to realize that the strange filly was right. She had caused nothing but trouble, and had shown no gratitude for Jane's eternal kindness. Now she had destroyed that too. _He hates me!_

Shoving herself from the bed, Lisbon wiped the tears streaming from her eyes and gave a silent goodbye to Jane. If she was going to do this, she would do it far away from a word she slipped out of the room and out of the bakery, carrying the gun with her.

Cold air slithered over her fur as she trotted into the town. Some of the night loving citizens stared at her, at the gun. In an instant the town broke into chaos. Ponies raced here and there, unsure of what to do. Was she going to shoot them, or herself? Should they take the gun away? What if she tried to kill them if they did?

Everything was silent in Lisbon's ears. The bustling town, the screaming citizens, nothing reached her. Shivers shook her entire body as she raised the gun to her own head. _The filly's right. this is the best thing I can do. I can't fix what I've done . . . I can, however, stop them from happening again . . ._ Her hoof hovered over the trigger. She sniffled and readied herself to press down, just the slightest touch would do it. An agonized scream tore through the chaos, crashing over the unbroken quiet that she had locked herself in. It wasn't her own voice that was crying now.

 ** _"_** ** _LISBON, STOP!"_**

Lisbon whirled around, dropping the gun from her hoof. Jane galloped to her, faster than she had ever seen anyone run. As he wrapped his hooves around her she collapsed. His gentle embrace warmed her frozen limbs.

The tears exploded without a warning.

"I'm sorry! I'm s-so s-sorry!"

"Shh . . ." the stallion hushed her. He gently ran a hoof over her shaking spine. "Just relax. It's okay now. I'm here, I'll always be here."

"What on earth is going on here?!"

Jane raised his head at the sound of Celestia's voice. A flash of light enveloped the town as the princess appeared in the center of the commotion. Her harsh eyes immediately moving from the gun to Lisbon's broken form, and finally resting on the frantic citizens.

"Princess . . . I'm sorry . . ."

Celestia shook her head. "I'm sorry as well, Jane." she said. "But saying sorry isn't going to revive the trust I had in you two. You promised me that you wouldn't disturb my ponies . . . then this happens?" Though her voice was filled with disappointment, Jane could hear a hint of sympathy underneath. "Please, understand that I'm only doing this for your own good . . ."

"Doing what?" ears flattening against his head in worry.

"Guards!" Celestia called forcefully. In an instant two armored unicorns were at her sides, undaunted by the discord of the town. "Please . . . bring these ponies to the Safety Institute."


	9. Chapter 9: Cleaning the Red Canvas

**Cleaning the Red Canvas**

Series of stretched out halls made up most of the Equestrian Safety Institute. Blinding white tiles clashed with the faded walls. It seemed that, at one point, the creamy paint was as bright and white as the floors. The building's smell resembled the harsh scent of a dental office, sharp and artificial enough to make you gag. As for as Jane could tell there were no windows. Lights flickered nervously along the ceiling, illuminating the entire building with their artificial energy.

Cells lined the walls, each roughly two meters apart. With roaming eyes, Jane carefully took in the surroundings. Almost every cell was barren. The one's that weren't were occupied by truly fearsome ponies that screamed and growled at the passing group with dangerous threats and promises. the guards never gave them an audience.

"Where are you taking us?" Jane asked, hi voice sounded loud against the unusual quiet of the building. Though he clearly saw the guard register his question, due to the settle prick of an ear, he received no answer. Beside him, Lisbon trudged along. She was staring at the floor with teary eyes and whispering what sounded like prayers. More than once she nearly tripped over her own hooves. Jane carefully closed the small gap between them, lending her his shoulder for extra support.

Angered, he repeated his question, barely biting back the snarl that threatened to invade his voice. "Where are we going?"

Dead silence followed. Lisbon stumbled again, regardless of Jane's support.

 _"Please?!"_

A snort came from one of the guards at their flanks. Jane was about to retort, but the guard spoke up unexpectedly. "You two will be placed in the R hall."

"The R hall?"

"It is about a five minute march from where we are now. The R hall borders the guard office." The guards reply sent shivers down Jane's spine. Suddenly the clapping of every guards hooves sounded like thundering drums fencing him in, trapping him. Cold shock shot through his bones, it was all Jane could do to keep walking.

He swallowed and struggled to figure out a way to fight back against the new disadvantage. Once he was confident he could speak without a stutter, he continued his interrogation.

"Why are we being paced in the R hall?"

"Those are the orders we received." the guard replied, clenching his teeth. His heavy armor clanked loudly as his pace slightly quickened.

Jane smiled inwardly. This was too easy!

Licking his lips he clacked his tongue. "I guess that's to be expected. From what I've seen all Equestrian guards do is piggyback Celestia like leaches." He yawned a little too loudly. "I should have known you don't actually have a clue what you're doing."

"You know nothing about Equestria!" the guard barked, shattering his stone-faced disguise. His companions stared at him warningly and e he took a breath before regaining his calm exterior. Even then, Jane could see the fur on his bare neck prickly.

"Pardon me for saying this, but it seems like I know about as much as you do right now Jane stated smugly, unable to keep his grin tucked away.

"We are taking you to the R hall because Celestia expressed deep concerns about you two." the guard said. He was smiling as well. Why shouldn't he be? He had proved to the cocky prisoner wrong! "Since the R hall is close to the guards office it will be easy to keep an eye on you two. If you get into any trouble it we'll be able to stop you in a moment."

"Is there really only one guard office?"

"There are plenty, but this one is the largest."

Jane nodded and stayed quiet after that. He had gotten the information he needed. They were close to the largest guard office, and there was probably little hope for escape. But being close to the largest guard office might not be such a bad thing. If he could work it into an advantage . . .

"Were here. Welcome to your new home."

The cell was small and simple. At the back left corner was a lonely bunk bed, opposite of that, a metal wall-seat that stuck out like a pimple on white skin.

"We're sharing a cell?"

"It's what the Princess wants. Honestly, I don't know what she's thinking this time."

Jane stifled a growl as the guards forced him and Lisbon into the cell. The iron barred door swung shut and he shot them a fierce glare from behind the bars that said, _"Don't get comfortable."_ The guards simply waved it off as an empty threat and walked away, leaving the two newbies alone in silence.

When Jane dragged himself away from the bars, he noticed Lisbon already settled on the cold, metal seat. Jane sighed and retreated to the bunk bed, sinking into the bottom half's stiff mattress. His partner's shivering kept him on edge. It was chilly in the cell, no doubt, but not _that_ chilly.

"Are you going to be okay?"

Lisbon's eyes flickered over to his general direction before they returned to their restless roaming. She toyed with the fur around her neck, searching for a comfort that wasn't there. She hadn't said a word since the incident that night.

"Look . . . I don't know what happened to you, but . . . I know that it wasn't your fault. You're a strong woman Teresa, the strongest and bravest one I know. So tell me who did this to you." he looked up hopefully, pleading for any sign that she had registered the question. "Teresa, please!"

Lisbon shook her head and pressed her hooves over her temples, blocking out the sound of Jane's voice, if she even heard it in the first place. Her lifeless eyes were glued to the floors, she was stuck in her own head, unable to escape. It was her own cell, one that couldn't be opened with a simple key.

"Teresa, who hurt you?" Jane flung himself from the bed and onto the tiles with a loud _clap_! He stomped towards Lisbon and sat in front of her desperately. His overwhelming frustrations were not because of her condition, but because of how helpless he felt. He was certain that it had to be Red John. At this point there was no denying that fact. Everything that had happened to them since arriving in Equestria was too coincidental to ignore. No matter what they did or where they went they were met with trouble. And then there was that filly that no one recognized, and the deceptive red mist from the Everfree. _Was that Red John?_

"Teresa, I know you'd hate me for even suggesting this, but . . ." Jane choked down the regret that was threatening to twist into his voice. "Please, let me hypnotize you! I can make you better! I can take the pain away if you just let me in your head for a second!"

Lisbon's eyes snapped towards him and she shot out her hooves like a rocket, sending him sprawling across the floor. Her breaths came in heaving gulps and she pushed herself closer to the wall, despite already having it pressing against her spine.

 _Teresa . . ._

* * *

Hours of waiting crawled by, slow and excruciating. Jane had aborted his troubled pacing and was now stretched out on the hard bed. Pained thoughts plagued his tired mind, testing his patience. _How long will we be here? Will we get home? Wh-_

 ** _Clang-clang_**

Jane perked up instantly at the sound of something clouting the metal bars. A guard was standing at the entrance, his horn enveloped with a yellow glow. Beside him were two levitating plates. He offered a small smile as he opened the door, most likely trying to keep the prisoners calm. "I bet you two are hungry." he said as he set down the two plates. "Eat up, I'll be back in about half an hour to pick up the plates."

The guard sauntered off and Jane hastily hopped towards the meal they had been brought. It wasn't much, just a few slices of bread and some soup, but it was better than nothing. His grumbling stomach howled with joy at the sight, and as he bit into the dry bread his stomach cheered. He swallowed the delicacy without hesitation.

"Lisbon, you're gonna regret it if you don't try to eat something." Jane chided, hoping that the less serious prod would encourage her to eat. Still, the mare stayed curled up on the metal seat, not bothering with the meal that was waiting for her. "Seriously, Teresa. The guard won't leave the plates here all night. You have to eat now, even if you aren't hungry."

"No thanks . . ."

Jane frowned and looked back at Lisbon's plate. Thinking fast he grabbed the bread and stuffed it underneath the mattress of the bottom bunk. _She'll thank me later . . ._ he thought as he patted the bedding and downed his cold soup. Though the flavor was a strange mix of bitter and sweet, he finished every drop and licked it from his teeth once the bowl was bare. _If I'm gonna think of a way to bust us out of here, I'll need all my energy._

Just as promised the guard returned when the thirty minutes were up. With the same welcoming smile he collected the plates and left the new prisoners to sit in their cell with nothing to do but think of all the things they could have done to avoid being the their current situation.

"So . . ." Jane muttered. "You ready to talk again?"

Lisbon shook her head and rested her head in her knees. Jane bit his lip and looked around the room. There was nothing he could do for her in the confined square. Trotting restlessly towards the door he waved a hoof between the bars and shouted, "Excuse me, hello?!" Minutes passed without a response, but the relentless clamor eventually caught the attention of a patrolling guard, this one a young female.

"Is there a reason you are making such a racket?" She narrowed her amber eyes and snorted. She was muscular, not one Jane would want to get into an argument with.

"I was wondering what the time was?"

The guard rolled her eyes. "The last time I checked it was a little after four. And that's A.M, not P.M. Still, you'll find that time doesn't matter much after a few days. They all ask at first . . ."

The guard continued with her rounds as Jane retreated to the back end of the cell. He helped Lisbon off the seat where she had been huddled up and set her on the bottom bunk. "You should get some rest. Tomorrow I'll get us out of here. I'm going to need your help though."

Lisbon nodded. "I'll be ready . . . tomorrow . . ."

"That's all I ask." Jane said. He gave her a quick hug before ascending the ladder leading up to the second bed. "Goodnight Lisbon."

"Goodnight, Jane . . ."

 _Nice to hear her call me that again . . ._

Within minutes the two had lost themselves to the beckoning call of slumber. What was left of the night raced by. It was like Jane had only blinked. When he woke again he felt worn and heavy eyed. The sounds of rustling covers beneath him alerted him to Lisbon's awakening as well. "Are you feeling better today?" he said as he hung off the side of the bed and stared down at his sleepy friend.

"I feel better, thanks . . ." Lisbon's unbrushed mane trailed across her face. Her eyes carried the same anguish from the day before. "And . . . I'm sorry . . ." A blush spread across Lisbon's face as she turned away from Jane's gaze, she had bread crumbs on her cheeks. "You never acted the way I did, and you've been through more than I ever have."

"Oh, Lisbon . . ." Jane shook his head and grimaced as he dug up memories from the past. "The only reason I wasn't like that was because I was too busy thinking about revenge every day. During the nights . . . I didn't sleep at all."

"Still . . . I was so weak!" Lisbon groaned and leapt out of bed. "I've failed so many people . . . So many . . ."

"Like who?"

"You!"

Silence boomed after that. Neither of them said a word, they just stared at each other in a tense moment of understanding. The cell walls disappeared, along with the bright tiles and settle tapping of the guards hooves in the distance. It was only them.

"Lisbon . . . You've never failed me. Right from the moment I joined with the CBI I knew that I trusted you with my life. I'd _give_ my life for you." Each word that he said was pure and true. He always had faith in her, no matter what. She was the only one he would open up to, the only one that was always at his side, even at his worst moments.

"What about my brothers, my dad, my mom? What about the team, and Hightower?" Tears leaked from her eyes and she shook her head to shake them away, wanting to scream from embarrassment. "I failed to protect all of them! I couldn't keep my father from hurting my brothers, I wasn't there when mom was hit by that drunken driver, and I couldn't stop my father from killing himself!"

"You're too hard on yourself." Jane swung down from the top bunk and alighted on the tiles beside his distraught friend. Wrapping her in a tight hug before she could pull away, he held her and stroked her mane comfortingly. "You threw yourself between your father and your brothers. That's more than lots of people would do. You were always there for your mother, there was no way you could have prevented her death. And your father . . . I have a feeling that he did what he did to stop himself from hurting his family. He loved you, Lisbon. You were his little girl. You were his darling Teresa."

Lisbon sobbed quietly into Jane's shoulder. All the time she had spent mourning, fretting, feeling wrecked and useless. It was ending. All she had to do was open up her heart, and it had taken this long . . .

 _But it's over . . ._

Swiping a hoof across her eyes and jerking her cascading tears away she came to life, a determined fire flaring in her verdant eyes. "So," she said. "You said you thought of a way to get us out of here?"

Snickering, Jane shoved her blithely. "Actually, I said I was thinking of a way to get us out. But I do have a plan. It will be a little difficult, and not one of my best, but I think we can pull it off. And if not, we'd rot in a cell anyway."

"How positive of you."

"Meh."

* * *

"Help me! Please, help!"

Jane banged against the restraining walls perilously. Behind him, Lisbon stared at him with savage eyes. Her breaths heaved and her ears twitched. She stepped dangerously close and it was all Jane could do to continue thwacking the iron bars in hopes that a guard would hear. _No, a guard has to hear!_

 ** _"Please, help!"_**

Jane's voice penetrated the mute hallways, bouncing off the walls for miles. Seconds passed without a trace of any guards, and in that time Lisbon had advanced upon him so that she hung over his shoulder, standing on her hind legs. Spittle hung from her turned up lips and she suppressed a small giggle as she twirled on her hooves as if to imitate a tipsy man.

Jane examined the hallway hastily and clanged the bars again. The sound of thundering hooves echoed in the distance, capturing Lisbon's attention. Her head swung towards the source as a single guard skidded to a stop just outside their cell, looking baffled. "What in Equestria is going on over here?!"

"Please help me! She's crazy! She'll kill me!" Jane wailed, forcing his hooves outside the bars to try to grab at the guard as Lisbon snatched at his shoulders, only missing by a hair! "Please help! Isn't there something you can do? Some sort of group that can take her away?" he screamed as he was pulled to the ground by his deranged cellmate. "Hurry!"

"I'll get the guards and we'll find our specialists that deal with paranoid patients! Uh . . . Just . . . Here!" The rattled guard sloppily slipped out a key and unlocked the cell. "Get out as fast as you can and close the door behind you! It should lock automatically. We're right by the main guard office. I'll get a message to them and we'll retrieve the specialists!"

As the freaked out guard scrambled away Jane pushed the barred door open. Lisbon wiped her mouth and laughed, slapping her knee. "I can't believe that actually worked! They really think I'm a psycho!"

"Well you did make a convincing one." Jane smiled and motioned to the open door. "But, how does escaping satisfy your fancy?"

Without another word the partners dashed out of the cell and crashed down the halls like a wildfire! They were on a roll! If they could keep up the pace and find the exit they were home free. Then they could leave and take cover somewhere where they wouldn't be recognized or found and work out a way to get home!

Jane turned another corner, Lisbon just behind him. While the guards had brought them to their cell the previous day, Jane had mapped out the way in his head. Now that they were making their escape he summoned it and let it guide him to the entrance. Within a few minutes a bright light began to shine at the end of the hallway they had taken. _The exit!_

Even at this point, there was no sign of guards chasing after them. A sure grin spread across Jane's face as his eyes flicked back to a map that blurred by, one he had seen when first arriving at the institute. The specialists that the guards were looking for only had one office in the entire building, and it was on the other end.

Jane and Lisbon burst through the front doors and charged towards Ponyville. The fresh air that surfed across their backs sent rays of pleasure coursing through their limbs. They had a goal! Get their bag of bits and scram!

"Alright! All we need to do is grab out money. After that we'll head somewhere else!" Jane's voice was at war with the wind gushing passed their ears, but Lisbon still got the idea.

"So much for getting home . . ."

"Better than dying in a cell!"

Unable to argue with that, she kept sprinting as fast as she could. Perhaps they would meet a pony with the ability to send them home one day.

The Safety Institute was only a short five minute gallop from Ponyville. Jane and Lisbon cleared the distance easily and were now darting between the bewildered Ponyville citizens. They were almost at the bakery! They'd be safe after that! All they needed was their money. Jane pushed his muscles to their full strength. _All we need to do is get-_

 ** _"HALT!"_**

The partners scrabbled to a stop as a brilliant flashed in front of them and tore across the town. In an instant it had faded, leaving Celestia where it had been. Her pink eyes were narrowed and threatening. Her wings were raised, showing their full glory.

Lisbon backed away first, dropping into a bow. They had been so close! So dreadfully close! Sweet scents flooded the air, coming from the close by bakery. Maybe if they had run a little faster . . . Maybe-

"So, you escaped?" Celestia was on the verge of tears, but not tears of disappointment. Her voice was light with jest, chuckles filling the town. "I can't believe my guards actually fell for your little stunt. It's too funny! And, Lisbon acting like a maniac? I have to say it was an entertaining show!"

Lisbon blushed red and shot a surprised glance at Celestia. "You saw that?"

"You think I just left you two in a cell without taking extra precautions?" she sighed and rested an armored hoof on her chest. "I do believe I owe you an apology. I only locked you up because I needed somewhere I knew you wouldn't cause trouble while I finished fixing you a portal home. Which, by the way, is finished."

Lisbon's ear twitched, for real this time, at her last words. "Did you say . . . . the portal back home is finished?"

"That I did."

Celestia's smile lit the fire of hope that had long been extinguished in both Jane and Lisbon. They were going home! Unable to suppress the painful joy, the two snatched each other up into a long, tight hug. _There's no place like home! Never thought I'd actually believe that!_ Lisbon thought joyously. She released Jane and turned back to Celestia. "Are we going now?"

Celestia nodded. "The portal is ready for you whenever you are prepared to go back home. I thought it was only appropriate to set it up in the same place where you first appeared. The center of Ponyville."

Lisbon nodded eagerly and her and Jane raced to Ponyville's center without a second thought. Tears flooding both of their eyes as they prepared themselves for the journey home. No matter what happened, they had managed to get through it. _That's what partners do, right? Or . . . is it something more?_

Tossing the silly thoughts from her head, Lisbon raised her eyes and spotted a glowing light in the distance. It wasn't as bright as Celestia's teleportation, but it was a competitor in the running. "The portal!"

Jane nodded and they sped to the contraption as quickly as they could. It was exactly like the one that had sucked them up before. But this time, it wasn't trying to take them to another world. It would take them back to where they belonged.

"Lisbon, Jane?"

The two in question turned around to see Pinkie stepping out from the crowd. She offered them both a bubbly hug and patted them on the shoulders. "I'm sure that if Twilight and the others were here they would want to say this too, but . . . I hope we can see you again."

"Maybe we will come back someday." Jane replied, winking heartily. "You never know with the way things have been lately."

"Too true!" pinkie beamed and urged them towards the portal. "Now get going! I bet your friends are worried about you two!"

Without any extra help, Jane and Lisbon yelled a thank you and leapt head first into the portal. They were met with an instant crushing sensation that tingled every bone, before a bright glow forced them to close their eyes. When they opened them again they were back in Red John's hideout. The man was gone.

"He got away . . ." Jane muttered raising from the floor, only to stumble back to his hands and knees. _Wait . . . hands and knees?_ Looking down he counted each of his fingers and wiggled his toes. Then, he ran a hand through his hair. It was no longer a thick mane. "Lisbon . . . we're back to normal!"

"I know!" Lisbon smiled and wiped the dust from her jacket. I can't believe it!"

Before either off them could celebrate for long, Lisbon noticed a dusty note on the cold ground before her. With cautious fingers she lifted it from the hard floor. It was stained with a red smiley face. Draped around it was her cross necklace, the one that had been lost in the Everfree back in Equestria.

"We lost Red John." Jane sighed. "What are we going to tell the team?" He looked to Lisbon, expecting her to be freaking out, but she simply shrugged her shoulders like it was no sweat, offering him a hand.

"Who knows." She hoisted Jane from the ground and hugged him again, glad to feel his strong arms around her. "We shouldn't feel too bad. After all, there wasn't much we could have done to prevent this. He did have control in Equestria. And despite that, we were able to ruin all his plans." her voice rang with pride as she put her newfound sureness to use for the first time. _I don't feel guilty, or stressed!_ "So how do you feel about coming back to my place?"

"Your place? How come?"

Lisbon shrugged, a blush rushing into her cheeks. "Well . . . I just . . . I guess it was nice to have you with me all those nights and . . . I didn't think you'd want to go back to your house just yet . . ."

Jane started at her, surprised. Still, she had a point. His own home had Red John's signature written all over it. He didn't want to go back there, not that night at least. "I think that would be wonderful . . ."

"You do?"

"Yeah, I do. And one day we can buy a ship and sail on it all over the world together."

"Wait, what?"

"We'll call it the Jisbon ship."

"That's a terrible name . . ."

The two partners shared a quick laugh before they made their way out of the warehouse. The mirror still stood proudly where they had left it. One day they would go back for it. Now that they knew where it lead, and how many friends they had waiting for them on the other side. So, as the night swallowed the warehouse, the two partners set out on the road back to Lisbon's. It would be a long drive, but that idea wasn't entirely unappealing for either of them.

 ** _Fin_**


End file.
